Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

This graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy such as manufacturing , retail , agriculture and healthcare in the US over a period from 1960 to 2020.

Overall , the manufacturing jobs decreased over the observed years while healthcare jobs increased significantly. Retail also went up steadily, though the agricultural jobs were decreased over this period.

A total of 15 million jobs were present in manufacturing 1960 which rose up to 20 million by 1980 after which the jobs started declining to approximately 13 million by 2020.

The retail and agriculture economy jobs were about 6 million in 1960 after which the retail economy flourished over the years and went up to 16 million by 2020 leaving agricultural economy jobs decling from 1960 to 1980 and remaining stable from 1980 to 2000 and then decreasing to about 2 million by 2020.

Approximately 2 million jobs of healthcare were present in 1960 lower than other sectors of the economy. By the end of 2020, this economy took a steady flight to equal number of jobs in the retail economy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You provide a clear overview of the main patterns: manufacturing rises before falling, healthcare grows strongly, retail increases, and agriculture declines. The key figures are generally accurate, including manufacturing’s peak at 20 million and the final retail and healthcare figures of about 16 million. You also make useful comparisons, such as healthcare starting below the other sectors and ending level with retail. This covers the task well, with the main trends supported by data. To make the report more fully developed, clarify that retail overtakes manufacturing by 2000 and that healthcare also surpasses agriculture and manufacturing’s earlier level of 15 million by 2020. Avoid broad phrasing such as “a steady flight,” which does not precisely describe the trend.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs reporting sector details. The sequence from the broad trends to specific figures is easy to follow, and linking phrases such as “after which,” “while,” and “by the end of 2020” help show changes over time. This gives the report a coherent progression. However, the final two paragraphs contain several trends in long, crowded sentences, especially the sentence beginning “The retail and agriculture economy jobs…”. Separating retail and agriculture into distinct sentences would make comparisons easier to process. Some linking is also mechanical; vary the repeated “after which” construction and use clearer references to each sector.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “decreased,” “rose,” “declining,” “remaining stable,” and “approximately.” These choices communicate the main movements, and terms such as “manufacturing” and “agricultural” are relevant to the chart. Some word choices and collocations are imprecise, however: “the retail economy flourished” and “this economy took a steady flight” sound unnatural for reporting job figures, while “a total of 15 million jobs were present” is unnecessarily awkward. There is also a spelling error in “decling.” Prefer direct, chart-focused expressions such as “employment in retail increased” and “healthcare employment rose steadily.” This would make the vocabulary more precise and appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including clauses linked with “while,” “after which,” and “though,” and the overall meaning remains clear. Some grammatical errors persist. For example, “the agricultural jobs were decreased” uses an incorrect passive form; write “agricultural employment decreased.” In “A total of 15 million jobs were present in manufacturing 1960,” the time expression needs “in 1960,” and the sentence would be more natural as “Manufacturing employed 15 million people in 1960.” The long retail-and-agriculture sentence also makes the relationships between clauses difficult to track. Check articles, prepositions, and verb forms, and use shorter sentences where several trends are being described.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.