Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

this graph provides us the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy (manufacturing,retail,agriculture,healthcare) and the jobs are measured in millions.

In start the jobs in manufacturing sector was at remain higher then the others but it went down at the end but the healthcare sector was not so much popular in job sector but with passage of time it increased moreover, the agricutre sector did not show the positive change .On other hand, retail sector increased as per time.

In 1960, jobs in manufacturing sector was higher than in 1980 it went on its peak from 15 millions to 20 millions respectively, then it went dowb in next coming years. In 2020 it ends on about 13 millions but on the other hand in 1960, jobs in healthcare sector was at its lowest point at bout 3 millions but it rapidly increased with time and and at abut 16 million in 2020.

Both argriculture and retail started from same point of 6 million in 1960 but retail start continously increasing and end at 16 million in 2020 but agricultu

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview: manufacturing declines after reaching a peak, while healthcare and retail rise and agriculture falls. Several key figures are also reported accurately, including manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980, and retail reaching 16 million in 2020. However, coverage is incomplete: the response ends mid-sentence while describing agriculture, so its later figures and overall decline are not fully reported. The healthcare starting value is given as about 3 million, whereas the chart shows about 2 million. The overview also says manufacturing was initially higher than the others, but does not clearly summarise the final comparison, when retail and healthcare are joint leaders. Include a complete account of all four trends and a sharper overview.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response from a general introduction and overview to details about the sectors, and phrases such as “on the other hand” signal comparison. However, progression is difficult to follow because several trends are crowded into long sentences, and the final paragraph breaks off at “but agricultu…”. The repeated use of “but,” “on the other hand,” and “with time” makes connections feel mechanical rather than precise. Paragraphing does not clearly separate the overview from the detailed comparisons, and some references, such as “it” in the manufacturing description, require the reader to infer the subject. Use a complete overview paragraph, then group related sector comparisons into clearly developed detail paragraphs with more exact linking.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “measured in millions,” “peak,” and “increased,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are unnatural or imprecise, such as “popular in job sector,” “positive change,” and “increased as per time.” Spelling errors, including “agricutre,” “dowb,” and “argriculture,” also reduce accuracy and can distract the reader. Aim for standard chart-description collocations and precise trend verbs, such as “employment in healthcare rose” or “agricultural employment declined.” Check spelling carefully, and avoid describing employment sectors as “popular” when the chart measures job numbers.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas using clauses and contrast, but the sentence structures are often faulty, and errors sometimes make relationships unclear. For example, “the jobs in manufacturing sector was at remain higher” has problems with articles, agreement, and sentence construction; “In 1960, jobs in manufacturing sector was higher than in 1980” also gives an unclear comparison and uses incorrect agreement. The long sentence beginning “In start…” joins several separate trends without reliable punctuation, while “and and” shows a further editing lapse. Most sentences would benefit from simpler, controlled structures before adding complex clauses. Practise accurate past-tense reporting, subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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