Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates how four sectors of the economy have contributed in the US to create number of jobs over the years in between 1960 to 2020.

There are four sectors that has been compared in the graph is as follow -:

Manufacturing , Retail , Agriculture and Healthcare. Each of these sectors has significantly boost the economy of US by producing jobs down the years.

Each sectors has been depicted with the unique line for a better understanding. If we talk about healthcare sector it generated 2-3 million jobs in the year 1960 and rose till 16 million jobs by 2020. There was a constant rise whithout any downside to its generation of jobs.

The agriculture sector produced jobs of around 6 million and it declined its pace of generating jobs by 2020 to 2-3 million that is a downgrade, Whereas retail sector intially had more job opening in 1960 compared to healthcare and created almost the same amount of jobs by 2020.

Manufacturing sector on the other hand created the most jobs in relation to all other sectors in 1960 but subsequently went down by 2020 below then both retail and agriculture.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and report several key trends accurately: healthcare rises from about 2 million jobs to 16 million, agriculture declines from around 6 million to 2 million, and manufacturing peaks before falling. However, the response lacks a clear overview that brings the main comparisons together. Some details are inaccurate or unclear: healthcare starts at 2 million, not 2–3 million, and retail rises from 6 million to 16 million rather than merely creating “almost the same amount” as healthcare. The claim that manufacturing falls below agriculture by 2020 is also incorrect; it remains at about 13 million, well above agriculture. A more complete summary should highlight the changing leaders and the broad contrast between growing and declining sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction to descriptions of individual sectors, and phrases such as “on the other hand” signal contrast. However, the progression is not consistently clear: the second paragraph lists the sectors and adds a general claim about their economic contribution, while the later paragraphs discuss trends without a concise overview to guide the reader. Some linking is mechanical or awkward, particularly “Whereas” after a comma in the agriculture-and-retail paragraph. The comparison between retail and healthcare is also difficult to follow because “almost the same amount” does not specify the years or figures. Grouping the rising sectors together, then the declining ones, and using precise references would make the organisation more coherent.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “rose,” “declined,” “constant rise,” and “subsequently went down.” This gives the response a basic range suited to the graph. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “contributed … to create number of jobs,” “boost the economy … by producing jobs,” and “declined its pace of generating jobs.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “whithout” and “intially,” and “downgrade” is not an appropriate description of a falling figure. Aim for standard chart language and accurate collocations, such as “the number of jobs increased” or “employment fell.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some longer sentences and uses time clauses and contrast, but grammatical control is inconsistent. Errors occur in basic sentence construction and agreement, for example, “There are four sectors that has been compared” and “Each sectors has been depicted.” The opening phrase “over the years in between 1960 to 2020” also has an incorrect prepositional pattern. Punctuation and sentence boundaries need attention: the agriculture-and-retail sentence joins contrasting ideas with a comma, and the colon and hyphen after “as follow” are not used appropriately. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas harder to understand. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then build complex comparisons with controlled clauses and punctuation.

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