Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The diagram below shows the data of United States about the number of posts in four different sectors of economy in the year 1960 and 2020. There are four sectors: Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare.

Overall, the Healthcare and Retail sectors have recorded a significant growth. Whereas the Manufacturing and Agriculture sectors had a significant dip by the year 2020.

In the year 1960 the Healthcare and Retail sectors had a parallel growth till the year 1980. At initial stage Manufacturing sector started to increase but after the year 1980 it started to decline continuously without a single inch of growth. The Agriculture sector also had a decrease within the years. Mainly the Healthcare sector grew at a very high speed with Retail sector parallel to it at a same speed of growth. The Retail sector also had a significant growth since the early stage without any interuptions and hurdles.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify all four sectors and give a relevant overview: healthcare and retail rise, while manufacturing and agriculture fall overall. This captures the broad direction of the chart. However, the report is framed as covering only 1960 and 2020, despite the graph also showing 1980 and 2000, and several comparisons are inaccurate or unclear. Healthcare and retail do not grow at the same speed: healthcare rises more sharply after 1980, while retail increases more steadily. Manufacturing also does not decline continuously from 1980, since its fall is interrupted by the period to 2000 only in the sense that the chart shows a gradual decline. Include key figures and compare the sectors at the main dates to make the trends more precise and fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to an overview and then to trend details. The overview helps the reader identify the main contrast between growing and declining sectors. However, the final paragraph repeats the idea that healthcare and retail grew quickly, and the sequence of details is not consistently clear. Phrases such as “parallel growth” and “at the same speed” make the relationship between the two sectors difficult to follow. The contrast marker “Whereas” is also used as a sentence fragment after the overview. Organise the body by grouping the rising sectors and the declining sectors, and use clear time references to guide the reader through 1960, 1980, 2000 and 2020.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “Manufacturing,” “Agriculture,” “growth” and “decline,” so the subject is generally clear. There is also some attempt to vary expression with phrases such as “significant dip” and “high speed.” However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing a graph: “posts” is not the right term for jobs, “parallel growth” does not accurately describe the trends, and “without a single inch of growth” is informal and unsuitable for an academic report. “Interuptions and hurdles” is also an awkward way to describe a steady rise, and “interuptions” is misspelled. Use precise trend language and avoid figurative or conversational expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex forms, including a time clause in “after the year 1980” and a contrast between sectors. The main trends remain understandable, but some sentence structures and grammatical choices are inaccurate. “Whereas the Manufacturing and Agriculture sectors had a significant dip” is not a complete sentence, and “the data of United States” has an incorrect article and preposition pattern. In “the Healthcare and Retail sectors had a parallel growth,” the article and noun construction are awkward; “the same speed of growth” also needs a more accurate structure. Check sentence completeness, articles, and subject–verb phrasing, and use past-tense forms consistently when reporting the historical data.

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