Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The provided line chart illustrates the data regarding the number of works in four sectors such as manufacturing,retail,agriculture and healthcare of the economy in a particulat nation the USA from 1960 to 2020.

Overall ,it is evident that the highest job sector was manufacturing while,agriculture experienced the lowest number over the period.Meanwhile,retail and healthcare showed upward trend.

At the beginning of the period,exact 15 millions of job was manufacturing. Followed by, it increased significantly and reach 200 millions in 18980 which was the highest amount.After that it drecreased noticably with around 13 millions of job in 2020.Contrastly,the agriculture field was almost 6 millions in 1960.Consequently,it dcreased after 1960 and reach approximetly 2 millions ,the least number of jobs.

Furthermore,retail and healthcare showed the same trend throuh out the period.In 1960,they started at nearly 6 and 3millions of jobs respectively.Between 1960 and 2020 they depicted similar trend and reach around 16 millions of job sectors .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview that manufacturing was initially the largest and agriculture the smallest, while retail and healthcare rose. However, the overview is not fully accurate across the whole period: by 2020, retail and healthcare were joint highest, rather than manufacturing remaining the highest. Some key details are also misreported or unclear: manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980, not “200 millions in 18980,” and healthcare began at about 2 million, not 3 million. The account of retail and healthcare is under-developed, as it does not distinguish their different starting points or show that healthcare rose more sharply. Select the main comparisons accurately and describe the changes at each stage more clearly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two detail paragraphs. The grouping of manufacturing with agriculture, followed by retail and healthcare, gives the reader a basic route through the data. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes unclear. For example, “Followed by” does not connect smoothly to the preceding sentence, and “Consequently” suggests a cause-and-effect relationship for agriculture’s decline that the chart does not establish. The final paragraph compresses two distinct trends into the claim that they showed the “same trend,” which weakens the comparison. Use clearer time-based sequencing and linking, and make each paragraph’s comparisons explicit rather than relying on broad connectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased significantly,” “upward trend,” and “the least number of jobs,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts difficult to interpret. “Number of works” is not the right expression for employment, and “200 millions of job” obscures the intended figure. There are also misspellings such as “particulat,” “drecreased,” and “approximetly,” alongside awkward phrases such as “job sectors.” Aim for accurate, conventional terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” “peaked at,” and “fell to,” and check spelling and singular/plural forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including “while agriculture experienced the lowest number over the period” and a sentence comparing the sectors. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction, tense, agreement, articles, and punctuation sometimes make the meaning hard to follow. For example, “At the beginning of the period, exact 15 millions of job was manufacturing” has an unclear structure and incorrect agreement, while “it increased significantly and reach” shifts incorrectly between verb forms. Commas are often attached to words without spaces, and some sentence fragments, such as “Followed by,” interrupt the flow. Practise complete, well-formed sentences and maintain consistent past-tense reporting.

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