Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the amount of jobs in each of the four sectors of the economy in the US from the year 1960 to 2020. Overall, both the retail and healthcare sectors followed the same trend of continues growing. While the manufacturing sector had been the highest throughout all the period it was overtook by both the retail and healthcare sectors in the last decade. The agriculture sector on the other hand had been slowly degrading overtime.

In 1960, the sector of manufacturing was the highest having 15 million jobs while retail and agriculture had equal amount of jobs which are approximately 6 million. The lowest sector was healthcare with about 2 million jobs. However through the next years alot have changed. The industrial sector has climbed to reach the absolute peak of the amount of jobs in 1980 of 20 million followed by a steady decline intersecting with the retail sector at about 15 million and in 2020 it stopped at just over 12.5 million. Retail and healthcare both followed the same pattern of climbing to both reach just above 15 million by 2020. Agriculture experienced a decrease and ended in 2020 with marginally under 2.5 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You cover all four sectors and provide a clear overview: manufacturing begins as the largest sector, while agriculture declines and retail and healthcare grow. Most figures and trends are grounded in the graph, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and agriculture’s low ending level. However, the overview says manufacturing was overtaken by both sectors “in the last decade”; the graph only shows that retail and healthcare are above manufacturing by 2020, not when the crossings occurred. Also, retail and healthcare do not follow exactly the same pattern: retail grows steadily, whereas healthcare rises more sharply after 1980. The final comparison could be more precise about their equal 2020 level and the changing ranking.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is organised into an introduction and overview followed by a paragraph of details, and the progression from the starting figures to later changes is generally easy to follow. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “However,” and “on the other hand” help signal relationships. This coherent structure is a strength. Some connections are less precise, though: “However through the next years alot have changed” is a broad transition that does not clearly introduce the specific trends, and the long sentence beginning “The industrial sector has climbed” combines the peak, decline, intersection and final value in a way that is difficult to track. Use clearer time markers and separate the manufacturing trend from the retail comparison to make the progression more controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “climbed,” “steady decline,” “intersecting,” and “experienced a decrease,” which helps describe the graph. Meaning is generally clear, but several choices are imprecise or unnatural for formal data reporting. “Amount of jobs” is less suitable than “number of jobs,” and “degrading” does not naturally describe a falling employment figure. “Absolute peak of the amount of jobs” is wordy, while “marginally under” is an awkward way to report a value. There are also spelling and form issues, such as “continues” where “continued” is needed and “alot.” Aim for concise, conventional collocations and accurate forms when describing rises, falls and totals.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a contrast with “While” and a relative clause in “the highest having 15 million jobs.” The main trends remain understandable, but some grammatical errors reduce accuracy. For example, “followed the same trend of continues growing” has an incorrect verb form, and “it was overtook” uses the wrong passive form. In “retail and agriculture had equal amount of jobs which are approximately 6 million,” agreement and tense are inconsistent, and the noun needs a plural form. The sentence beginning “The industrial sector has climbed” also shifts between tenses and contains several linked clauses. Check verb forms, agreement, articles and tense consistency, and divide long sentences where needed.

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