Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graph illustrated information about the significant amount of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the us from 1960 to 2020. Overall, it is clear that manufacturing jobs steadily increased and then dramatically fall. Retail and agriculture jobs gradually rose up over the period. One noticebly experienced were seen in healthcare jobs had decreased continuously over the period.

Initially, manufacturing jobs were dramatically increased from 1960 to 1980 which were 20 millions afterwards sharply decreased or surge from 1980 to 2020. Agriculture and retail jobs were gradually climbed up and meet almost same over the 15 millions.

On the other, healthcare jobs were approximately 6 millions in 1960 and then seen a noticeable declined until 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies the chart’s subject and attempts an overview, but several central trends are reversed or unclear. Manufacturing rose to about 20 million in 1980, then fell to 13 million by 2020; the response captures the initial rise but describes the later movement as “decreased or surge.” Retail increased, but agriculture declined rather than rising, and healthcare climbed from about 2 million to 16 million rather than declining. The claim that retail and agriculture reached almost 15 million is also inaccurate. These errors leave the main features inadequately reported. In addition, the response is 108 words, below the required 150, limiting the detail and comparisons it can provide. Include an accurate overview and select key figures to support each trend.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic structure: an introduction, an overview beginning “Overall,” and two body paragraphs. This gives the reader some sense of organisation, and the sectors are grouped together in places. However, progression is difficult to follow because the body paragraphs do not consistently compare the series or present their changes in a clear sequence. Connectors such as “Initially” and “On the other” are used, but the latter does not introduce a clear contrast, and the final paragraph’s healthcare description conflicts with the chart. Some sentences also combine several ideas without clear relationships. Organise the report around accurate trends—for example, manufacturing and agriculture’s declines after their peaks, then the growth in retail and healthcare—and use linking phrases to show comparisons precisely.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “approximately,” and “over the period,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or awkward, such as “significant amount of jobs,” “rose up,” and “decreased or surge.” “Dramatically” is repeated and does not always suit the size or direction of the change. There are also spelling and word-form problems, including “noticebly” and “One noticebly experienced,” which make parts of the report hard to interpret. Aim for precise verbs that distinguish rises from falls, and use natural collocations such as “the number of jobs” and “rose steadily.” Check spelling and avoid repeating the same intensifier.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and more complex sentence forms, including an overview sentence with “Overall” and a time clause beginning “from 1960 to 1980.” However, many sentences contain errors in verb forms, agreement, or sentence construction. For example, “manufacturing jobs steadily increased and then dramatically fall” shifts tense, while “One noticebly experienced were seen in healthcare jobs had decreased” is not a complete, well-formed sentence. The phrase “which were 20 millions” also has an unclear reference and incorrect number agreement. These problems sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Use past tense consistently for the historical data, make each sentence express one clear comparison, and check subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms before finishing.

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