Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrate about the figure of jobs in four different proffessions of economy is US between 1960 and 2020
.
Overall, manufacturing sector was the largest in 1960 and reached to its peak in 1980 before declining. In contrast retail and agriculture are are experiencing the upward trend continously, While agriculture sector showed an overall decrease.
In 1960 the manufacturing jobs rate was 15 millions and it become to 20 millions in 1980 which was their heighest growth,While healthcare sector start from around 6 millions in 1960 and grow upto 15 million in 2000 and was still gowing whenever they reach to 16 million their peak.
While on other hand the agriculture was the weak sector which was round about 6 million in 1960 and moveing conteniosly in downward direction and fall to 2 million i the year 2000 that sector was the weakest.Another sector is healthcare which begin from 3 million in 1960 and reached to 16 millions in 60 years.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify a relevant overall contrast: manufacturing is initially the largest sector and then declines, while agriculture falls overall. However, the overview is partly inaccurate: retail rises, but agriculture does not show an upward trend, despite the phrase “retail and agriculture are… experiencing the upward trend.” Several figures and dates are also confused. Healthcare starts at about 2 million, not 6 million, and reaches about 11 million in 2000 before ending at 16 million; the response gives different starting and intermediate values. Agriculture reaches 2 million in 2020, not 2000. Retail’s rise is not described. To make the report more complete, accurately summarise all four trends and select key comparisons, especially the convergence of retail and healthcare at about 16 million in 2020.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response has an opening, an overview, and further detail, so there is some organisation. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the sector descriptions are mixed together and repeated: healthcare is discussed in two separate places, while retail receives little clear coverage. Linking phrases such as “In contrast,” “While,” and “on other hand” are attempted, but some are used inaccurately or create awkward transitions. The final paragraph also combines agriculture and healthcare without a clear comparison. Grouping the information into a paragraph about rising sectors and another about declining sectors, with each sector described once, would make the sequence easier to follow and reduce repetition.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “peak,” “declining,” “upward trend,” and “downward direction,” which helps communicate broad movements. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “figure of jobs,” “professions of economy,” and “weak sector.” Spelling errors—including “proffessions,” “continiously,” and “conteniosly”—also make parts of the report harder to read. Use standard chart language consistently, such as “number of jobs,” “sector,” “rose,” and “fell.” Check spelling carefully and avoid describing a sector as “weak”; instead, state that it had the fewest jobs or the lowest figure.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a contrast introduced by “In contrast,” but control is uneven. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in phrases such as “The graph illustrate,” “it become to 20 millions,” and “healthcare sector start.” Articles and sentence construction are also problematic, as in “the agriculture was the weak sector,” while punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, particularly around commas and sentence boundaries. These errors sometimes make the intended timeline or comparison unclear. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and subject–verb agreement, and build shorter, complete sentences before combining ideas with linking clauses.
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