Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph reveals the information about number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US,in the year 1960 to 2020. The has been calibrated in numbers . At first glance ,it is crystal clear that in the year 1960 jobs in manufacturin sector was 15 and in the retail sector jobs were 5 . In agriculture sector and healthcare sector job were 6 and 3 respectively. Next it can been that in the year 1980 jobs in manufacturing sector was increased with 20 and jobs in retail industry was 10. In agriculture sector the jobs were decresed with 3.5 and in the healthcare sector jobs went upward with the 5 . Movinfg further , it is lucid that in the year 2000 in the manufacturing industury jobs went downdward with 14.5 and in the retail sector jnumber ogf jobs were 15 .In the agriculture sector and in the healthcare sector number of jobs were 6 and 11 respectively . In the year 2020 in the manufacturing industury jobs were less that wa only 13 and in the retail sector the jobs were 16 . In the agriculture sector jobs were highly less that was only 2 and in the healthcare sector there are more jobs that was 16. After scrutinising the whole data , the gist is that more jobs are in the retail sector in the year 2020 and less jobs opportuinte in the agriculture sector .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You cover all four sectors and report figures at each of the four dates, so the reader can follow the broad changes. However, several figures do not match the chart: healthcare in 1960 is about 2 million, not 3; agriculture in 2000 is about 3, not 6; and manufacturing in 2000 is about 17, not 14.5. The overview is also incomplete and partly inaccurate: retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million in 2020, rather than retail alone having the most jobs, while agriculture is consistently the smallest or among the smallest. Focus on the main overall patterns—manufacturing peaks in 1980 then declines, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture falls—and check figures against the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response follows the dates in chronological order and uses signposts such as “At first glance,” “Next,” and “In the year 2020,” which gives it some basic organisation. However, it is presented as one long paragraph, and the repeated year-by-year sequence does not create a clear overview followed by well-grouped details. Some linking phrases are awkward or repetitive, and the final sentence does not clearly summarise the full set of trends. Improve progression by using a brief introduction and overview, then group the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together. This would make comparisons easier to follow and reduce the mechanical listing of figures.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “sector,” “manufacturing,” “retail,” and “jobs,” and attempt alternatives such as “went upward” and “scrutinising.” However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, including “jobs were less,” “jobs opportunity,” and “the gist is that more jobs are in the retail sector.” Spelling errors such as “manufacturin,” “decresed,” and “industury” are noticeable and sometimes make reading less smooth. Use precise trend language and standard collocations, for example, “employment rose,” “the number of jobs declined,” and “the sector employed the fewest people.” Check spelling carefully and avoid decorative phrases that do not add meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and linked sentences, and the reader can generally identify the years and sectors being discussed. However, sentence structures are limited, and frequent errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and punctuation make parts difficult to read. Examples include “jobs in manufacturing sector was 15,” “it can been that,” and “there are more jobs that was 16.” The opening also has an incomplete construction: “The has been calibrated in numbers.” Use a consistent past tense for the historical data, check singular/plural agreement (“the number … was,” but “jobs were”), and separate sentences with accurate punctuation. More controlled comparisons using “while” or “whereas” would also broaden the sentence patterns.

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