Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

This graph illustrates how many jobs in the US in four economy sectors( manufacturing, retail, agriculture anf healthcare) betwen 1960 and 2020.Unit of measurment is millions.

Overall,manufacturing sector had generally the greates numberof jobs during the given periode wherease agriculture has the lowest one .People tend to work in retail and healthcare during the given periode while jobs in manufcaturing and agricultural sectors witnessed a decrease.

Initially ,15 millions jobs were opened in manufaturing sectore and it increased twenty years later to achieve the highest score 20 millions jobs before drastically dropped to reach considerably under the initial number in 2020. Agriculture sector was the sectore with the least number of job starting at nearly 6 millions and then fell and stabilised at approximatly 4 millions or 3.5 millions

Both healthcare and retail sectors witnessed an increase in the number of opportunities; starting respectivelly at nearly 2 millions and just over 50 millions and then dramatically increased during the whole period to hit just over 15 millions of jobs opportunity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and give a relevant overview, noting agriculture as the smallest sector and describing growth in retail and healthcare. You also report manufacturing’s rise to 20 million in 1980 before it declined. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing did not have the most jobs throughout, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, compared with manufacturing’s 13 million. Some details are unclear or incorrect, especially saying agriculture stabilised at 4 or 3.5 million; it was about 3 million in 1980 and 2000, then fell to 2 million. Retail’s starting figure is also misreported as “just over 50 millions.” Select the key turning points and compare the final figures more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. The grouping of manufacturing with agriculture, followed by retail and healthcare, helps the reader follow the main trends. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Initially,” and “Both” also signal the stages of the report. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some progression. To make the flow more consistently clear, avoid placing several trends and figures in one long sentence, as in the final paragraph, and use clearer comparisons between the series. Punctuation and spacing around transitions also need attention, for example “Overall,manufacturing” and the semicolon before “starting.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “increased,” “decrease,” “stabilised,” and “highest,” and the reader can generally understand the trends you intend to describe. However, the range and control are limited by repeated or inaccurate expressions. “Jobs were opened” and “number of opportunities” are not natural ways to describe employment totals, while “hit just over 15 millions of jobs opportunity” has awkward word choice and form. There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “betwen,” “measurment,” “agricultural,” and “respectivelly,” which reduce precision. Use standard collocations such as “the number of jobs stood at,” “rose to,” and “fell to,” and check spelling and plural forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast in the overview and a sentence describing a rise followed by a fall. The main trends remain understandable, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms are frequent enough to affect clarity. For example, “manufacturing sector had generally the greates number” is missing an article and has an unclear structure, while “it increased twenty years later to achieve” does not clearly identify the subject of the increase. In “starting respectivelly at nearly 2 millions,” the participle does not connect smoothly to the sentence. Work on articles, plural forms, and complete sentence structures, and divide long sentences so that each comparison is grammatically clear.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.