Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph provides information number of jobs in several sectors of the economy in the US over six decades between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is obviously that Healtcare and Retail have been increased significanly throughout the period. Meanwhile Manufacturing experienced an increase before it fall down by the end of period.

In 1960, Manufacturing had the highest number of job among those three of job sectors by 15 million jobs. by 1980, it reached its peak to 20 millions, and after that decreased significanly to around 14 millions in 2020. Meanwhile Agriculture has shown a downtrend from approximately 6 millions to around 4 millions since in between 1960 and 1980, and after that it remain stable between 1980 and 2000 with a slight dip in 2020.

On the other hand, Healthcare and Retail skyrocketed form around 3 millions and 6 millions to 11 millions and 15 millions respectively over four decades, whereas healthcare successfully overtaken Agriculture in 1980 and both them remain increase which also overtaken manufacturing in 2020 by ended up at 16 million jobs, making both of this job as the highest number of jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad pattern that manufacturing rises and then declines, while retail and healthcare grow, and you include several relevant figures. However, some key details are inaccurate or unclear: healthcare starts at about 2 million, not 3 million, and agriculture falls from 6 million to 3 million by 1980, then remains near 3 million until 2000 before reaching about 2 million. The claim that both retail and healthcare overtake manufacturing in 2020 is also incorrect: they finish at about 16 million, compared with manufacturing at 13 million, but the chart does not show when each overtakes it. The overview is present, yet the account of the main comparisons needs more precise reporting.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs, and it uses contrast markers such as “Meanwhile” and “On the other hand.” This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression becomes difficult in the final sentence, where several trends and comparisons are compressed into one long clause (“both them remain increase which also overtaken manufacturing…”). Some linking is also mechanical or unclear, and the grouping of sectors shifts without a fully controlled comparison. Use shorter sentences to separate the healthcare and retail trends, and organise details consistently—for example, describe the declining sectors together and the rising sectors together.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “peak,” “downtrend,” “stable,” and “overtaken,” and the meaning is generally recoverable. However, the range and control are limited by repeated or inaccurate expressions. “Skyrocketed” overstates the steady increases shown, while “successfully overtaken” is not a natural or objective way to describe a chart trend. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “Healtcare,” “significanly,” and “form,” which reduce precision. Aim for neutral, accurate reporting language and check spelling carefully. Phrases such as “rose steadily,” “reached a peak,” and “declined to” would describe the data more appropriately than dramatic or evaluative wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “while,” “whereas,” and “which,” but control is inconsistent. Errors occur in basic sentence patterns and in longer constructions: “it is obviously that” needs a different structure, “Manufacturing experienced an increase before it fall down” has an incorrect verb form, and “both them remain increase” is not grammatically formed. There are also problems with articles, plurals and sentence boundaries, as in “the highest number of job” and the lowercase “by” after a full stop. These errors sometimes make relationships between trends difficult to follow. Build accuracy first with clear subject–verb sentences, then add subordinate clauses once the core sentence is secure.

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