Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020 with comparison to the number of jobs in millions.

In the year 1960, both retail and agriculture hold about 6 million jobs while manufacturing holds 15 million jobs and health care by 3 millions.The line graph of agriculture sectors is constantly declining without rising in any years before and holds a job probably of 3 million, which is the lowest job holding sector in the economy of US since 1960. From the year 1960 to 2020, the retail and health sectors are continuously rising whereas the agriculture and manufacturing sectors are declining. In 1980, the manufacturing had the peak of jobs of 20 millions after then constantly declining and holds the jobs of around 13 millions.

In overall, the leading sectors in the forms of jobs in the economy of US from the 1960–2020 are retail and health care which are holding the job of approximately 16 millions each.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several important patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, agriculture falls overall, and retail and healthcare rise to about 16 million jobs by 2020. These points show a relevant understanding of the graph. However, coverage is partial and some details are inaccurate or unclear: healthcare starts at about 2 million, not 3 million, and agriculture ends at about 2 million rather than remaining at 3 million. The overview also calls retail and healthcare the leading sectors without clearly comparing their final figures or noting that manufacturing began as the largest sector. To strengthen the response, report the main changes across all four sectors accurately and make the key comparisons explicit. Thirteen words copied from the task prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure, moving from an introduction to details and then an overall statement. It also groups related trends, such as the rise in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. However, progression is not always clear: the second paragraph combines several figures and trends in a long sequence, and the final overview repeats information rather than synthesising the main contrast between sectors. Some linking is awkward, particularly “after then,” while “In overall” is not an effective transition. Use clearer paragraphing for the overview and key details, and connect comparisons with precise links such as “whereas” or “by contrast” to make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “declining,” “peak,” “sectors,” and “approximately,” and the reader can generally understand the trends you describe. However, the range is limited by repeated wording such as “jobs,” “holds,” and “sectors,” and several phrases are unnatural or imprecise. For example, “the leading sectors in the forms of jobs” and “the lowest job holding sector” do not express the comparisons naturally. “Constantly declining” is also too strong for agriculture, which stays level between 1980 and 2000. Build a more precise range of trend and comparison language, and check collocations so that descriptions sound natural and accurately reflect the data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, and the main message is usually understandable. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, plurals, and punctuation are noticeable. For instance, “retail and agriculture hold” shifts awkwardly into the past context, “manufacturing holds 15 million jobs” does not maintain consistent tense, and “health care by 3 millions” is not a complete grammatical construction. The sentence beginning “From the year 1960 to 2020” also needs clearer parallel structure. There are missing spaces after full stops and commas, as in “millions.The.” Use past-tense forms consistently for the historical data, check singular and plural forms, and divide long sentences where needed.

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