Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line graph illustrates the employment opportunities available in four different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020, measured in millions.

Overall, manufacturing sector had the highest opportunities available comparing to other three sectors, while retail and healthcare domains recorded the lowest jobs at the beginning of the period and then rose significantly in 2020.Agriculture sector remained constant during 1980 to 2000.

On the one hand, manufacturing industry recorded 15 million jobs in the US during 1960, followed by 20 million of rise in 1980 before it declined to 17 and 14 million in 2000 and 2020 respectively. In the case of agriculture domain opportunities were around 6 million which fell considerably to 3 million and remained constant through 1980 to 2020.

On the other hand, retail and healthcare sectors' available jobs were between 2-6 million in the beginning and it gradually increased in 1980 and 2000. Finally, it peaked to 15 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the overall rise in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture, and you include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980. However, the overview is partly inaccurate: manufacturing did not remain the leading sector throughout, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, above manufacturing at roughly 13 million. The agriculture description also says it remained constant from 1980 to 2020, although it fell from about 3 to 2 million by the end. The final paragraph groups retail and healthcare together and gives only one endpoint, so their distinct trajectories and final values are unclear. Report each series separately and make the end-of-period comparison explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group the declining and rising sectors. The contrastive signposts “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help readers follow this structure. This coherent organisation is a strength, but progression within the final paragraph is less clear because retail and healthcare are combined despite having different starting points and trends. The phrase “in the beginning” is also vague, and the overview’s ideas run together at “2020.Agriculture,” where a space or sentence break is needed. To make the progression more precise, describe each rising sector in turn and use clear time references such as “by 1980” and “by 2020.”

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “employment opportunities,” “declined,” “rose significantly,” and “remained constant.” These choices make the general subject and direction of change understandable. However, some less common expressions are not natural or precise for describing chart data: “highest opportunities available” and “20 million of rise” are awkward, while “domains” and “industry” are used where the chart names sectors. “Peaked to 15 million” is also inaccurate in context, as the series reaches about 16 million in 2020. Prefer standard reporting language such as “number of jobs,” “increased to,” and “stood at,” and use the sector labels consistently. This would improve precision without requiring more elaborate vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex forms, including the overview clause beginning “while” and the sentence describing manufacturing’s changes across several years. Most of the meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors reduce accuracy. For example, “manufacturing sector had” needs an article (“the manufacturing sector”), and “comparing to” should be formed as “compared with.” In “before it declined to 17 and 14 million,” the figures need clearer parallel phrasing, such as “to 17 million in 2000 and 14 million in 2020.” There is also a missing space after the full stop in “2020.Agriculture.” Review articles, comparison structures, and punctuation, while continuing to use varied sentence patterns.

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