Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph below informs us about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between the year 1960 and 2020.

Firstly, we can see the jobs of manufacturing which started from 15 million in the year 1960 and rised to 20 million in the year 1980. However, after 1980 we can see a sudden fall in the jobs. In the year 2000 there were approximately 17 million jobs. After that, in the year 2020 there were only 13 million jobs left.

In comparison with jobs of manufacturing we can see a rise in the number of jobs of healthcare. As in the year 1960 the number of jobs were about 2-3 million but in the passsing years the number of jobs only increased. As we can see in 1960 there were 5 million jobs, after that in the year 2000 there were about 11 million jobs. Finally, in 2020 there were 16-17 million jobs.

However, no decrease was seen in their number of retail jobs during [redacted phone]. The agriculture sector decresed from 6 million to 2 million over these years. In 1960 there were 6 million jobs, in 1960 and 2000 there were 3million jobs and eventually in the year 2020 there were only 2 million jobs left.

In conclusion, each sector of economy had an increase and decrease in the number of jobs, but the two sectors; manufacturing and agriculture had a visible decrease.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You report several key figures accurately, including manufacturing rising from 15 million to 20 million before falling to 13 million, and agriculture declining from 6 million to 2 million. However, the task is only partly covered: retail is mentioned only as having no decrease, with no figures or account of its rise from 6 to 16 million. The healthcare description also contains a contradiction: it says there were 2–3 million jobs in 1960, then says there were 5 million in that same year; 5 million is the 1980 figure. The overview is unclear because “each sector ... had an increase and decrease” does not accurately summarise all four trends. Select and compare the main changes more clearly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic structure, moving from manufacturing to healthcare and then to the other sectors, and time markers such as “Firstly,” “After that,” and “Finally” help show sequence. However, progression is uneven: retail receives only one brief sentence, while the conclusion repeats a broad claim rather than bringing the main comparisons together. Some linking is mechanical or confusing, particularly “In comparison with jobs of manufacturing” and the repeated “In 1960” in the agriculture paragraph. The healthcare paragraph also shifts between years in a way that makes the sequence difficult to follow. Grouping the two rising sectors together, then the declining sectors, and using clearer comparisons would make the organisation more coherent.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the general subject, including “manufacturing,” “healthcare,” “agriculture,” “rise,” and “decreased.” However, the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, such as repeated references to “the number of jobs” and “jobs left.” Some word choices and collocations are awkward, including “the graph below informs us” and “a sudden fall” for a gradual decline across the later years. Spelling errors such as “passsing” and “decresed” are noticeable. Aim for more precise trend language and vary how you describe figures and changes; this will make the report sound more natural and concise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences with time clauses, and the main meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences awkward or confusing. For example, “the jobs of manufacturing which started” is an incomplete construction, while “the number of jobs were” has subject–verb disagreement. The healthcare sentence gives two different figures for 1960, and “in 1960 and 2000 there were 3million jobs” has an unclear time reference. There are also inconsistent article and plural patterns. Practise accurate sentence frames for describing figures, such as “The sector employed…” and “Employment rose from… to…,” and check agreement and punctuation.

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