Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line illustrates the data about jobs secured by four different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the jobs between [redacted phone] in four sectors. The high noticable change between this four sectors is healthcare, this sector started with low value rose constantly. Agriculture sector shown the dropping of number of jobs from the intial level.
In genral, the highest value between this four sectors is 20 million in manufacturing sector of economy and least sector is Agriculture which lower than 5 million. Where all the sectors are shown increment in the value of job factor by the year 2020 from 1960.
Manufacturing feild shown sudden rise from 15 to 20 million and than slight drop in the value of job market by year of 2020. Their is an emerging point of retail and agriculture they started from same level but retail was increasing with 15 million and agriculture was decreasing with lower then 5 million jobs in opposite direction.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak before declining, healthcare grows, and agriculture falls. You also make relevant comparisons, such as manufacturing and agriculture starting at 15 and 6 million respectively, and retail and agriculture beginning at the same level. However, some key details are unclear or inaccurate. The overview says all sectors increased by 2020, although agriculture declined throughout and manufacturing ended below its 1980 peak. The statement that retail reached 15 million omits its final rise to about 16 million, while healthcare’s substantial growth is not quantified. To strengthen the report, give a clearer overview of the contrasting trends and include accurate start and end figures for each sector.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, overview, and a paragraph describing selected trends. This helps the reader identify the purpose of each section. However, progression is uneven: the overview is followed by a paragraph that repeats broad claims, and the final paragraph combines manufacturing with retail and agriculture without covering healthcare’s later figures. Linking phrases such as “Overall,” “In general,” and “Where” do not always connect ideas clearly; “Where” is especially awkward as a sentence opener here. Organise the body by contrasting trends—for example, rising sectors versus declining sectors—and use clear references and transitions so each comparison follows logically.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “rose,” “drop,” “increasing,” and “decreasing,” and the reader can generally understand the trends you intend to describe. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a graph. Phrases such as “jobs secured,” “value of job factor,” and “emerging point” do not express the data clearly, while “high noticable change” is vague. Spelling errors, including “genral,” “intial,” and “feild,” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of trend and comparison terms, and check spelling and collocations; for example, describe the number of jobs as rising or falling rather than referring to a “value” or “factor.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, and the opening sentence communicates the chart’s subject. However, sentence control is inconsistent, and some structures are incomplete or difficult to follow. “Overall, the jobs between 1960-2020 in four sectors” is a fragment, while “The high noticable change between this four sectors is healthcare” has problems with article use, number agreement, and sentence construction. In “Where all the sectors are shown increment,” the clause is not grammatically connected to the preceding sentence, and “Their is” should be “There is.” Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use accurate past-tense forms to report changes over the period.
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