Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This graph show the four stage of job sector in 60 yar. first of all manufacture sectore, manufacture sector probbly increase 1960 to 1980 and after 1980is down fall is continue.

secondly, Retail sector is second job sector of the economy is ths US. This sector is better then manufacturing sector because the continuesely increase job opportunity for 2000.

Third is Agriculture sector this sector is badly effect is this period and probabbly down sising.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify three relevant sectors and give a broad sense of their direction: manufacturing rises before falling, while agriculture declines. However, the response is far too brief to summarise the graph adequately, and it omits healthcare entirely. Several claims are incomplete or inaccurate: manufacturing falls after 1980, but you do not report its later level; retail does not simply become “better” than manufacturing, and its rise continues through 2020. Agriculture falls overall, but it remains stable between 1980 and 2000 before declining again. Include an overview comparing the main trends and report key figures for all four sectors. The response also contains 75 words, below the required 150, which leaves the task substantially underdeveloped.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic sequence, signalled by “first of all,” “secondly,” and “Third,” so the reader can see that you are moving from one sector to another. This provides some organisation, but the ideas are not developed into a clear summary: there is no introduction identifying the graph’s subject, no overview of the main comparisons, and no concluding synthesis. Some links between ideas are unclear, particularly “This sector is better then manufacturing sector because the continuesely increase job opportunity for 2000.” Grouping related trends and using clearer comparisons would improve progression. For example, discuss the rising sectors together, then contrast them with agriculture’s decline, while using accurate linking phrases such as “whereas” and “by contrast.”

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “manufacturing sector,” “Retail sector,” “Agriculture sector,” and “increase,” which helps identify the subject. However, the range is narrow, and several word choices or forms make the meaning difficult to follow: “four stage of job sector,” “better,” and “down sising” do not express the trends precisely. There are also frequent spelling errors, such as “sectore,” “probbly,” and “continuesely.” For a graph summary, use precise trend language and collocations, such as “the number of jobs rose,” “employment declined,” and “remained stable.” Check spelling carefully and avoid vague evaluations such as “better” when a direct comparison is needed.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to organise information in sentences and use some time references, but grammatical control is inconsistent. The opening, “This graph show the four stage of job sector in 60 yar,” has problems with subject–verb agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence construction. In “manufacture sector probbly increase 1960 to 1980,” the verb form and the pattern for expressing a time period are incorrect. The sentence about retail also lacks a clear grammatical structure, making the intended comparison hard to understand. Most sentences are simple, and there is little evidence of accurate complex structures. Practise complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, for example: “Manufacturing employment rose from 1960 to 1980, before declining.”

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