Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the number of jobs in the four sectors from 1960 to 1980 increasment in manufacturing from 15millions to 20millions jobs, retail from 6millions to 10millions jobs , health care from 2millions to 5millions jobs and decreasment in agriculture from 6millions to 3millions jobs . from 1980 to 2000 the agricilture number of jobs stayed constant 3millions jobs ,the healthcare jobs kept inceasing to 11 millions jobs and retail also increased up to 15 millions while manufacturing dicreased from 20 millions jobs to 17 millions of jobs . from 2000 to 2020 manufacturing kept dicreasing to 13millions of jobs , retail increased a little from 15 millions of jobs to 16 millions of jobs , healthcare increased also to same number as retail , and agriculture secreased from 3 millions of jobs to 2 millions of jobs , so in 2020 high and equal number of jobs in both agriculture and retail

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You report several key figures accurately, including manufacturing’s rise from 15 to 20 million before falling, and the growth in healthcare and retail. However, the response is mainly a sequence of changes between dates rather than a clear summary of the graph’s main features. It lacks a distinct overview identifying the broad patterns—for example, manufacturing peaked in 1980, agriculture declined overall, and healthcare and retail rose to become the largest sectors by 2020. The final comparison is also inaccurate: you say agriculture and retail had equal numbers in 2020, whereas healthcare and retail were equal at about 16 million, and agriculture was lowest at about 2 million. Selecting and summarising the most important trends more clearly would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response follows the timeline, moving from 1960–1980 to 1980–2000 and then 2000–2020, so the reader can generally follow the changes. However, it is presented as one long, largely unpunctuated sequence, with no clear paragraphing or separate overview. Repeated transitions such as “from 1980 to 2000” and “from 2000 to 2020” provide basic organisation, but the ideas are often joined mechanically with “and” or commas. This makes comparisons between sectors harder to identify, and the final sentence does not clearly connect to the figures it summarises. Grouping the overview separately and using shorter, logically linked sentences would make the progression clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary such as “manufacturing,” “agriculture,” “retail,” and “healthcare,” and verbs including “increased,” “decreased,” and “stayed constant” communicate the general trends. However, the range is limited and several word-form, spelling, and collocation errors are noticeable, including “increasment,” “decreasment,” “dicreased,” and “secreased.” Phrases such as “increased a little” are understandable but imprecise, while repeated use of “jobs” and “number of jobs” makes the account sound repetitive. Use accurate trend vocabulary and vary expressions—for example, “rose steadily,” “fell,” or “remained stable”—while checking spelling and natural combinations such as “15 million jobs.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts to describe changes across several time periods, but most information is placed in long sentence-like strings rather than controlled sentences. Frequent problems with sentence boundaries and punctuation are evident, particularly where a new period begins after “jobs” without a capital letter or full stop. There are also errors in grammatical patterns, such as “from 2millions to 5millions jobs,” and the final clause, “so in 2020 high and equal number of jobs,” lacks a complete, well-formed structure. The limited range of sentence forms means relationships between trends are often expressed through repeated “and.” Practise writing complete sentences with accurate articles, plurals, and punctuation, then combine ideas using a wider range of structures.

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