Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sectros of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail and healthcare accounted significant rise of jobs throuhtout the time period. In the early time period, Jobs in the manufacturing sector dominated all other sectors but, faced sudden fall. Whereas, Agriculture was the least job providing sector in 2020.

In 1960, Manufacturing sector provides huge number of jobs, where the number increased to 20 million in 1980. But suddenly, number of jobs of Manufacturing went on decreasing after 1980.

Agriculture also accounted gradual decrease in providing number of jobs and stood at last in terms of providing jobs.

In 1960, Healthcare and retail provides only 2 million jobs and 6 million jobs respectively, As the time period passed on, the number of jobs went on increasing gradually. In 2020, they almost share same proportion of jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad trends: manufacturing starts as the largest sector and then declines, while retail and healthcare rise; you also note that agriculture is the smallest by 2020. However, the overview is incomplete because it does not mention that retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million jobs in 2020, or that retail overtakes manufacturing by 2000. Some details are vague or inaccurate: manufacturing does not fall “suddenly,” and agriculture is already the lowest by 1980, not only in 2020. The report is also 144 words, below the required 150, so the trends and comparisons are not developed sufficiently. Add key figures and clarify when the main changes occur.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. The sectors are grouped in a generally sensible way, and time markers such as “In 1960” and “In 2020” help orient the reader. However, progression is limited: the body paragraphs do not consistently compare sectors at the same dates, and the manufacturing and agriculture paragraph ends without a clear comparison to the rising sectors. Linking is sometimes awkward, particularly “Whereas” beginning a sentence fragment and “As the time period passed on” being used as a broad transition. Build a clearer chronological account, connect comparisons explicitly, and use cohesive devices accurately rather than relying on a few repeated time phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased,” “decreasing,” “gradual decrease” and “share same proportion.” This gives the reader a basic understanding of the graph. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are unnatural, such as “accounted significant rise of jobs,” “huge number of jobs,” and “least job providing sector.” There are also spelling errors, including “sectros” and “throuhtout,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, conventional chart language and vary the verbs used for upward and downward movement. For example, describe a sector as employing a certain number of people, or say that employment rose or declined, rather than using “providing jobs” repeatedly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast with “Whereas” and a time clause beginning “As the time period passed on.” The main meaning is usually understandable, but errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries. For example, “Manufacturing sector provides” should use a past-tense form, while “Healthcare and retail provides” has a subject–verb agreement error. “Overall, retail and healthcare accounted significant rise” is missing a grammatical link, and the capitalisation after the comma in “respectively, As” is incorrect. Some sentences also become fragments, as with “Whereas, Agriculture…” Practise accurate past-tense reporting and complete, well-punctuated comparisons.

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