Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrate the information related to number of jobs in four different parts of the economy in the US between years 1960 and 2020.

Overall, Healthcare and retail shows the upward trend throughout the period. On the other side menufecturing and agriculture faces the decline ratio.

In 1960, menufectoring sector geting highest jobs with the propertion of 15%. Although it rose up 1980 and reached at 20% but suddenly its decrease in 2000 at around 17%. But its propertion drop again in economy sector in 2020 approximetly at 14%. Similarly in the sector of agriculture its ratio was at 6% in 1960 but its decline in 1980 at 3%. Moreover, its number stood at same ratio at 3% in 2000.However decline again reached at approximetly at 2%.

As compared to other sector like healthcare and retail both faces upword trend in economy sector thoughout the period. In 1960, retail and healthcare at 6% and 3% recpectively. In 1980, reached at 10% and 5% both had upword ratio. At the end of the period both at 15% in 2000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between rising healthcare and retail employment and falling agriculture employment, and you include several relevant figures for manufacturing and agriculture. However, the overview is incomplete: it does not mention that manufacturing peaked in 1980 before declining, or that retail and healthcare both finished at about 16 million. Some figures are also inaccurate or unclear: the chart measures jobs in millions, not percentages, and healthcare in 1960 was about 2 million rather than 3. The final comparison says both sectors were at 15 in 2000, although healthcare was about 11; it also omits the 2020 figures. Select the main turning points and end values, and report them accurately to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and separate paragraphs for declining and rising sectors. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is weakened by incomplete comparisons and abrupt or unclear links. For example, the final paragraph stops after the 2000 figures, leaving the period’s endpoint unreported, while “At the end of the period both at 15% in 2000” is confusing because 2000 is not the end of the period and the two values differ. Connect each sector’s figures in chronological order and use clear references such as “by 2020” and “in contrast.” Check punctuation around transitions, including the missing space after “2000.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “upward trend,” “decline,” “reached” and “stood,” so the main movements are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “decline ratio,” “faces upword trend” and “geting highest jobs.” Repeated use of “ratio” is also unsuitable because the graph reports numbers of jobs, not proportions or percentages. Spelling errors such as “menufecturing,” “propertion” and “approximetly” are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause. Aim for precise, repeated-use terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” “rose,” “fell” and “remained stable,” and proofread sector names and common trend vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use time markers to describe changes, but the range of sentence structures is limited and errors occur frequently. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “Healthcare and retail shows” and “both faces”; verb forms are also faulty in “its decline in 1980” and “both at 15%.” Articles and sentence construction are often missing or awkward, as in “In 1960, retail and healthcare at 6% and 3% respectively.” These errors sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to follow. Practise building accurate comparison sentences with a clear subject and verb—for example, “Retail employment rose from 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980”—and check agreement, tense and punctuation in each sentence.

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