Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given graph depicts the number of jobs in four sectors of economy in the US between 1960 and 2020

Overall , The highest number of job is in manufacturing in 1980 and lowest number of job is in agriculture in 2020 . Number of job in retail and health care market both have shown a significant increase throughout the period on the other hand number of job in agriculture was on the lower side than others

In detail , Number of job in retail and agriculture market have shown opposite trend through the year , Both started with approx 6 million job in 1960 but as compared to 2020 agriculture have lower number of job with 2 million and retail have 16 million , On the other hand retail and healthcare market have equal number of job in 2020 but compared to 1960 , Retail have 6 million and healthcare have 3 million which definetly showed a huge progression in health care job market , Number of job in manufacturing have followed a quite different trend , It has shown a growth between 1960 and 1980 after which it has shown a significant drop in further 40 years

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify several important features accurately: manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980, agriculture falls to roughly 2 million by 2020, and retail and healthcare both reach around 16 million at the end. The overview also captures the broad rise in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, some comparisons are unclear or inaccurate: retail begins at about 6 million, not 6 million versus healthcare at 3 million in 1960; healthcare starts at about 2 million. The statement that retail and agriculture show “opposite” trends is broadly relevant but could be explained more precisely. Healthcare’s strong rise is mentioned, but its stages and comparison with manufacturing are not fully developed. A clearer overview and more carefully selected comparisons would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction and overview to a detail paragraph, and the reader can follow the main trends. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “On the other hand,” and “after which” help connect comparisons and changes over time. However, the detail paragraph contains several long, loosely joined statements, so relationships between ideas are sometimes difficult to track. For example, the sentence comparing retail and healthcare in 2020 then shifts to their 1960 figures without a clear transition, and the figures are not presented in a consistent order. Use separate sentences for each comparison and organise the details by trend or by sector. This would make cohesion less mechanical and referencing clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “significant increase,” “opposite trend,” “growth,” and “drop.” These choices communicate the main movements, and terms such as “manufacturing” and “agriculture” are appropriate to the chart. Some wording is repetitive or imprecise, particularly the repeated phrase “number of job” and the use of “market” for economic sectors. “On the lower side than others” is also an awkward way to describe agriculture’s comparatively low figures. There are spelling errors, including “definetly,” and some collocations are unnatural. Aim for more precise chart language, such as “employment,” “sector,” “rose steadily,” and “declined,” while checking spelling and avoiding repeated phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a contrast with “on the other hand” and a time sequence using “after which.” The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “number of job” needs a plural noun, and “retail and agriculture market have shown” has an agreement and article problem. The sentence beginning “In detail” runs through several clauses with commas, making its structure difficult to control; full stops would help. Capitalisation after commas is also inconsistent, as in “Overall , The highest.” Practise accurate plural forms, articles, subject–verb agreement, and sentence boundaries. More controlled complex sentences would improve accuracy without sacrificing range.

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