Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph below illustrates the data regarding the number of employement (in millions) across the four economical sectors in the US between 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the number of jobs in sectors of Agriculture and Retail started from the same point but the ratio of jobs in Retail sector increased while the number of employement decreased in the Agriculture sector. furthermore, Manufacturing sector Jobs increased for 20 years but with the increasing time they kept decreasing till 2020 however the number of jobs in Healthcare sector kept increasing with the time.
Interestingly, the number of jobs in Agriculture sector started from above 5 million but decreased and reached at the level below 5 million till 2020 however the number of employements in Retail sector also initiated from more than 5 million but they have increased till more than 15 million. Furthermore, the number of jobs in Healtcare sector increased and reached at the same level as of Retail sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises before declining, agriculture falls, and healthcare grows; you also note that retail and agriculture begin at a similar level and that healthcare and retail finish at roughly the same level. These are relevant features and give the response a clear overview. However, several points are only partly developed: the overview does not state that retail rises steadily, and the body gives no figures for manufacturing or healthcare. “Agriculture ... reached at the level below 5 million till 2020” is broadly accurate but too imprecise to show its fall from about 6 to 2 million. Include key values at the main years and compare the sectors more directly to make the summary more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and a paragraph of details, and the ideas generally follow the chart’s timeline and sector groupings. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “however” and “Furthermore” help signal relationships. However, progression is limited because the final paragraph repeats several overview points rather than adding a fuller set of comparisons or figures. Some links are also awkward or unclear: “with the increasing time” does not express the trend naturally, and the long final sentence joins several ideas without clear separation. Organise the details into clearer comparisons—for example, declining agriculture against rising retail, then manufacturing against healthcare—and use linking words only where they clarify the relationship.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “sector” and “reached,” so the main trends are understandable. There is also some attempt to vary phrasing through expressions such as “started from” and “initiated from.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “number of employement,” “economical sectors,” “ratio of jobs” and “increased with the time.” “Ratio” is not the right term for the number of jobs, and “employment” is generally uncountable in this context. Spelling errors such as “Healtcare” and inconsistent capitalisation also reduce control. Prefer precise, standard chart language such as “employment,” “economic sectors,” “the number of jobs” and “rose steadily.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses linked with “but,” “while” and “however,” and the overall meaning remains understandable. Some sentence patterns are controlled, such as “the number of jobs in Healthcare sector kept increasing.” However, errors in articles, prepositions, tense and sentence boundaries recur. For example, “between 1960 to 2020” should use “between ... and ...,” while “reached at the level” has an unnecessary preposition. The overview’s long sentence beginning “furthermore” combines several clauses and needs clearer punctuation; “with the increasing time they kept decreasing” also has an awkward grammatical construction. Use past simple consistently for the historical data and check articles and prepositions in phrases such as “the healthcare sector” and “reached a level.”
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