Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The graph below display information about the number of vecancy in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Jobs in manufacturing change their numbers at differents stage of years. Vecancy in retail increase their value in this time periods. Jobs in agriculture its decrease their numbers in this time cycle. Healthcare jobs inhance their value in this all years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify all four sectors and give the broad direction of change for each: manufacturing changes, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture falls. However, the response does not provide a clear overview of the main comparisons or report any figures, so key features such as manufacturing peaking in 1980 and healthcare catching up with retail by 2020 are missing. The description is also very brief and does not develop the trends sufficiently. It contains 51 words, below the required 150-word minimum; 13 words copied from the task prompt were excluded from that count. To improve, write a fuller summary with an overview and selected figures that support the main trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a basic sequence, mentioning manufacturing, retail, agriculture and then healthcare, so the reader can identify which sectors you are describing. However, it is presented as one short block, with no clear introduction, overview or developed grouping of information. The repeated sentence pattern—each sentence names a sector and then states a general trend—also limits progression and makes the report feel like a list. Use separate paragraphs for an overview and the detailed comparisons, and connect related trends, for example by contrasting the growth in healthcare and retail with the decline in agriculture.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary such as “manufacturing,” “retail,” “agriculture” and “healthcare,” and the reader can generally understand the intended trends. However, several word choices and forms are inaccurate or unnatural: “vecancy” does not mean jobs, “inhance” is not the appropriate verb here, and “change their numbers” is an awkward way to describe a trend. “Increase their value” also suggests monetary value rather than job numbers. These errors, alongside repetition of “jobs” and “numbers,” restrict precision. Use accurate terms such as “employment,” “the number of jobs,” “rose,” “declined” and “remained stable” to describe the data clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt several complete sentences, and the basic subject–verb pattern is usually recognisable. However, grammatical control is uneven. In “The graph below display,” the singular subject requires “displays”; “Jobs in agriculture its decrease” has an incorrect sentence structure; and “in this all years” uses an incorrect word order. The response relies almost entirely on short, simple statements, so it shows little range in sentence structures. Practise accurate clauses with time phrases, such as “While manufacturing employment rose until 1980, it then declined.” Check subject–verb agreement, sentence construction and word order before submitting.

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