Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph shows that the number of jobs in four fields of the economy in the year of 1960 to 2020 in US.The data is given in millions.

Overall,it is clear that maximum number of jobs were shown in manufacturing sector while least number of jobs done by people in the agriculture field from the same years.

Firstly,in 1960 almost 15 million individuals did work in manufacturing and this trend inclined in the upcoming years but suddenly it was delcined and reached at 12 millions.Moreover, in 1960 two millions of folks were started their jobs in healthcare and it was inclined drastically and reached at peak point like 16 millions.

In retail and agriculture sectors people starting their jobs from 6 millions but retail tend rise suddendly and agriculture field followed dropped trend in all years 1960 to 2020. Furthermore, lowest number of masses were shows less interest in agriculture it was 3 millions only .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several relevant trends, including manufacturing’s rise and subsequent fall, healthcare’s strong growth, and agriculture’s decline. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing did not have the most jobs throughout the period, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, compared with manufacturing at about 13 million. Some details are also unclear or incomplete: manufacturing peaked at about 20 million in 1980, while retail rose steadily from 6 to 16 million. The agriculture description gives 3 million as its lowest figure, although it falls to about 2 million in 2020. A more precise overview and clearer comparisons of the final rankings would make the key features better developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. Sequencing words such as “Firstly” and “Moreover” help signal the movement between details, and the reader can generally follow the broad trends. However, the grouping of retail and agriculture in one paragraph makes their contrasting patterns less clear, while the manufacturing and healthcare paragraph combines separate trends without a clear comparison. Some linking is mechanical, and phrases such as “Furthermore” introduce information that is not clearly connected to the preceding point. Organise the body by contrasting related trends and use references such as “by 2020” to make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing data, including “inclined,” “reached,” “peak point,” and “dropped trend.” However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for an academic graph report. “Individuals did work” and “folks” are informal or awkward, while “people starting their jobs from 6 millions” does not clearly describe the number of jobs. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “delcined” and “suddendly,” and repeated use of “jobs” and “field.” These choices sometimes make the intended meaning harder to interpret. Use standard trend language and precise terms for figures, such as “employment,” “rose,” “fell,” and “stood at,” while checking spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, but control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to understand. For example, “in the year of 1960 to 2020 in US” has faulty preposition and article use, while “two millions of folks were started their jobs” has problems with number, tense, and verb construction. Subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “lowest number of masses were shows.” Several sentences run together without a space after the full stop, and commas are used inconsistently. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and straightforward sentence patterns first, then add complex clauses only when you can control their grammar.

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