Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the details about the number of jobs in four areas of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, there was a rise for retail and healthcare, while, the manufacturing and agriculture went down in those years.

In 1960, the jobs in manufacturing was 15 million and that went to 20 million in next two decades. After that, there is a massive dip. In 2020, the number of jobs are just over to 10 million.

For retail, the graph demonstrates a very huge increase between 1960 and 2000. Nevertheless, from 2000 to 2020 the graph line is a steady.

There is esclation for the healthcare sector and the graph shows the number of jobs around 15 million in 2020. Although it was approximately 2 million in 1960.

For the agriculture, there was a decrease between the given years adn valu

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the broad contrast that retail and healthcare rose while agriculture declined, and you report several relevant figures, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980. However, the overview is incomplete: manufacturing did not fall throughout the period, since it first rose, and retail did not remain steady after 2000; it increased slightly from 15 to 16 million. Healthcare reached about 16 million, not around 15 million. The agriculture paragraph is cut off, leaving its trend and figures unreported, and the response is 147 words, below the required 150. These omissions and inaccuracies mean the main features are only partially covered. Complete the final comparison and check each trend against the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction and overview to separate sector descriptions. This gives the reader some organisation, and phrases such as “After that” and “Although” attempt to connect information. However, progression is weakened by the abrupt ending in “and valu,” which leaves the agriculture section unfinished. Some links are also unclear or mechanically used: “Nevertheless” introduces a period that is not actually a contrast, while “Although it was approximately 2 million in 1960” is a fragment rather than a complete connected sentence. Develop each paragraph to a clear endpoint and use linking expressions to show accurate relationships between changes.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant task vocabulary such as “manufacturing,” “retail,” “healthcare,” “increase,” and “decrease,” so the subject is generally clear. There are also attempts at more descriptive language, including “massive dip.” However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural: “details about” is vague, “a very huge increase” is redundant, and “the graph line is a steady” uses the wrong form. “Esclation” is misspelled, and the final “valu” is incomplete. These errors make the range seem limited and sometimes distract the reader. Aim for precise trend language and accurate collocations, for example “rose steadily,” “remained stable,” and “declined.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including “Although it was approximately 2 million in 1960,” but control is inconsistent. Agreement errors appear in “the jobs in manufacturing was” and “the number of jobs are”; use “were” and “was,” respectively. The phrase “went to 20 million in next two decades” needs an article (“the next two decades”), and “just over to 10 million” has an incorrect construction. The sentence beginning “Although” is incomplete, and the final sentence is unfinished, so some structures are difficult to follow. Use complete sentences and check subject–verb agreement, articles, and verb forms. More accurate control of these basic patterns would make your comparisons clearer.

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