Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph below illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. Manufacturing sector had the highest number of job in 1960 but gradually decreased after that, Where as Healthcare was at the lowst level in strat but simultaniously incresed in the next years.

In the graph, the two sectors which had same numbers of job in 1960 had showed totally different level of jobs Agriculture and Retail both was at 6 million. Agriculture had simultaniously decreased and had no growth, from 6 million jobs to 3 million in 1980 till 2000 it was stedy no change but in 2020 in fall again to 2 milliom jobs. Retail sector continuously grow in each year in 1980 it had 10 million jobs then the highest level 16 million in 2020.

Healthcare sector had increased gradually in 1960 it had 3 million jobs which reached to higher level 15 million in 2000 and after that it was at same level as Retail sector with 16 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing starts highest and later declines, while healthcare and retail rise and agriculture falls. You also include several relevant figures, such as agriculture dropping from 6 million to 3 million and then 2 million. However, some key details are inaccurate: healthcare begins at 2 million, not 3 million, and reaches 11 million in 2000, not 15 million. The overview is also incomplete because it does not clearly state that retail and healthcare both finish at about 16 million, or that manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before falling. More accurate selection and comparison of the main stages would make the summary more complete and reliable.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic, relevant structure: an opening overview is followed by details about agriculture and retail, then healthcare. This gives the reader some sense of how the information is grouped. However, the progression is not consistently clear, and the first paragraph combines several trends without a precise overview. Connections such as “Where as” and “simultaniously” are either awkwardly used or do not clearly express the relationship between the series. The long middle sentence also packs several time points together, making the sequence harder to follow. Organise the report into a concise overview and clearly separated comparisons, using accurate links such as “by contrast” and “while” to show how the sectors differ.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “gradually decreased,” “continuously grow,” and “same level,” which helps communicate the general trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, including “had no growth” for a continuing decline, “highest level” where a precise comparison is needed, and “in fall again.” Spelling errors such as “lowst,” “strat,” “stedy,” and “milliom” are noticeable and reduce the clarity and control of the vocabulary. Aim for accurate trend language and collocations, for example “remained stable,” “fell further,” and “rose steadily,” and check spelling carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with time clauses, but control is inconsistent. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in phrases such as “both was at 6 million,” “had showed,” and “continuously grow.” The sentence beginning “Agriculture had simultaneously decreased” also has an unclear structure, especially around “from 6 million jobs to 3 million in 1980 till 2000.” Capitalisation and punctuation are uneven, including the comma splice after “that” and the capitalised “Where” mid-sentence. These problems sometimes make the timeline difficult to interpret. Practise forming clear past-tense comparisons, such as “Agriculture fell to 3 million by 1980 and remained there until 2000,” and use full stops to separate complete ideas.

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