Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph shows some information from the numbers of jobs in four different sectors of the eceonomy at Us through 1960 to 2020.

The million numbers of jobs about four sector of economy in US 1960 some sectors are jobs up with some stage of down. In 1960 2 million of healthcare jobs with some increae in 1980 about 5 million. Healthcare jobs boost up into 11 million in 2000 and highest increased jobs 16 million.

1960 agriculture job 6 million with down into 4 million in 1980. 2000 about the same 4 million but 2020 slightly lowest 3 million.

Retail jobs in 1960 about 6 million with increased in 1980 10 million. in 2000 retail jobs slightly increased like 15 million but the highest in 2020 about 16 million.

Manufacturing jobs in 1960 15 million with increased in 1980 20 million. Some decreased on 2000 about 17 million and 2020 lowest 14 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You report all four sectors and include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing rising from 15 million to 20 million before falling, and healthcare increasing from 2 million to 16 million. However, the response lacks a clear, accurate overview of the main comparisons: it does not state that manufacturing was initially the largest sector, while retail and healthcare rose to joint-highest levels by 2020. Some figures are also inaccurate: agriculture is about 3 million in 1980 and 2000, then 2 million in 2020, rather than 4, 4 and 3 million; manufacturing ends at about 13 million, not 14. The opening is unclear and does not establish the overall trends. Select the key patterns and summarise them accurately before giving details.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic, helpful structure: it introduces the graph and then gives separate paragraphs or sections for healthcare, agriculture, retail and manufacturing. This makes the information reasonably easy to locate, and the repeated year-by-year sequence provides some organisation. However, there is little overall progression from a clear overview to supporting details, and the opening sentence about sectors going “up with some stage of down” is too vague to guide the reader. Connections between ideas are mostly limited to repeated “with” constructions, while the abrupt spacing before “in 2000” also interrupts the flow. Add a concise overview after the introduction, then group related trends and use clearer links such as “by contrast” and “whereas”.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic vocabulary to identify the data, including “healthcare jobs,” “agriculture,” “retail jobs,” and “manufacturing jobs,” and words such as “increased” and “decreased” communicate basic trends. However, the range is limited and several choices or collocations are unnatural, sometimes making the meaning harder to follow. For example, “the million numbers of jobs” and “highest increased jobs” do not express the intended ideas naturally; “boost up” is also too informal for an academic report. Spelling errors such as “eceonomy,” “Us,” and “increae” further weaken control. Build a more precise set of trend expressions, such as “the number of jobs,” “rose steadily,” “peaked at,” and “declined to,” and check spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to report changes across several years, and the reader can generally identify the intended sectors and figures. However, sentence structures are very limited, with many fragments or incomplete patterns, such as “In 1960 2 million of healthcare jobs with some increae in 1980 about 5 million.” Articles, plurals and prepositions are often missing or incorrectly used, as in “four sector of economy” and “increased in 1980 10 million.” The opening sentence also has an unclear grammatical structure. These recurring errors sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to understand. Practise complete subject–verb sentences, for example, “Healthcare employment rose from 2 million in 1960 to 5 million in 1980,” and vary these with accurate comparative clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.