Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph mainly represents the 4 major job sectors in US economy from [redacted phone].Firstly,we will discuss about "Manufacturing",in 1960 there were 15 Millions job in us the peak jobs produced by this sector was in 1980 where it reaches to 20 Millionjobs in the market after that it started diclining drastically without a chance of improvements and by the end of 2020 the job ratio droped from peak 20 Million to 14.5 Million. the other sector is "Agriculture" ,in 1960 it was producing around 6 Million jobs then it start to drop from 1960 to 1980 and stopped at 3 Million. now over the period from 1980 to 2000 this industry stayed stable at 3 Million Jobs but after that it started to dicline slowly and ends up around 2.5 Million jobs.Now let's have a look at "Retail" and "Healthcare" these two sectors were the only one that were performing exceptional , in 1960 the jobs were around 6 Million and 2.5 Million simantaniuosly and were on the track of producing more and more jobs and at he end of 2020 ended up at 16 Millions for both Retail and Healthcare sectors

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You report several key figures accurately: manufacturing rises from 15 million to a peak of 20 million before declining, agriculture falls from about 6 million to 3 million and then 2 million, and both retail and healthcare reach 16 million by 2020. This gives the reader a relevant account of all four sectors. However, the overview is not clearly separated from the details, and the main comparison—that manufacturing was initially dominant while retail and healthcare grew to equal it by the end—is only partly conveyed. Some descriptions are also imprecise: manufacturing ends at about 13 million, not 14.5 million, and healthcare begins at about 2 million. A clearer overview and more precise reporting of these figures would make the summary more complete and better focused on the graph’s main features.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows a generally understandable sequence, moving from manufacturing and agriculture to retail and healthcare, and phrases such as “after that” and “over the period” help show changes over time. However, the whole answer is presented as one long paragraph, so the overview and supporting details are not easy to distinguish. The repeated transitions “Firstly,” “now,” and “Now let's have a look” make the progression feel somewhat mechanical, while the final sentence combines several comparisons and figures without clear separation. Organise the response into an introduction, a concise overview, and one or two detail paragraphs. Use linking expressions selectively and make sure each sentence has a clear focus.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “peak,” “drop,” “stable,” and “ends up,” so the reader can follow the broad movements. There are also attempts at more descriptive language, such as “performing exceptional,” although this phrase is not natural in this context. Several spelling and word-choice errors—“diclining,” “droped,” “simantaniuosly,” and “job ratio”—reduce accuracy and polish. Some expressions are conversational or repetitive, particularly “Now let's have a look” and “more and more jobs.” Choose precise, conventional terms for graph descriptions, such as “employment,” “rose,” “declined,” and “remained stable,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences using time clauses and conjunctions, for example, “after that it started…” and “over the period from 1980 to 2000…”. This shows some range, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, long sentences joined mainly by commas make the structure difficult to control. There are errors in tense, agreement, articles, and plurals, as in “the peak jobs produced… was,” “it reaches,” and “16 Millions.” Missing spaces after full stops and inconsistent capitalisation also affect punctuation. Use shorter, clearly punctuated sentences and check that verbs agree with their subjects and remain in the past tense when describing the historical data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.