Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This line graph illustrates the information about jobs in four different companies of the economy in the United State of America between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that the department of healthcare and retail increased considerably, whereas manufacturing experienced a decline after reaching its peak.

Looking more closely at the figures, the employement in agriculture was declined from 1960 to 1980 and afterwards remains steady, while manufacturing increase in this period. Subsequently, job of healthcare and retail sharply grow over the years.

Moreover, healthcare and retail business was more than 15 million in the year 2020. Manufacturing jobs go up and has the biggest employement rate in 1980 about 20 million while others at 5 or 10 million.

To conclude, the agriculture remain equal in 1980 to 2020. Healthcare sharp increase from 5 to 12 million while it is at the lowest point on starting and after increased.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad pattern that healthcare and retail rise while manufacturing falls after a peak, and you note agriculture’s decline and later stability. However, the account is only partial: several key comparisons are missing or unclear, including that manufacturing is highest in 1980, and that by 2020 healthcare and retail are joint-highest at about 16 million. Some details are inaccurate: healthcare rises from about 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020, not from 5 to 12 million, and agriculture falls to about 2 million by 2020 rather than remaining unchanged throughout 1980–2020. Develop a clearer overview and support it with accurate start, peak, and end figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing details. This gives the reader some organisation, and phrases such as “Overall” and “Moreover” signal relationships between points. However, progression is not consistently clear: the final “To conclude” repeats agriculture and healthcare points rather than adding a distinct summary, while the middle paragraphs move between sectors without a clear comparison. Some linking is also awkward, such as “while others at 5 or 10 million,” which leaves the relationship incomplete. Grouping the figures into a clear comparison of manufacturing/agriculture and retail/healthcare, then using accurate references such as “by contrast” and “by 2020,” would make the sequence easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased considerably,” “decline,” “peak,” and “lowest point.” These choices show an attempt to vary language beyond simply listing figures. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the report less natural: “four different companies of the economy” mislabels the sectors, “department of healthcare” is unsuitable, and “sharp increase” needs a more natural form in context. There are also spelling and word-form errors, including “employement.” Use precise terms such as “sectors,” “employment,” and “number of jobs,” and choose trend verbs that fit the data, such as “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “whereas” and a time sequence with “while.” However, grammatical control is inconsistent, and errors occur in many sentences. For example, “the employement in agriculture was declined” uses an incorrect passive form, while “manufacturing increase” and “healthcare and retail sharply grow” do not maintain the appropriate past tense. Agreement is also faulty in “healthcare and retail business was,” and “the agriculture remain” lacks the correct verb form. These errors sometimes make the intended trend or time relationship harder to understand. Practise describing past data with consistent past-tense verbs and check subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete sentence structures.

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