Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given image is the line graph that highlightes the number of jobs in 4 sectors of the economy manufacturing, retail, agriculture,healthcare in the US in the year of 1960 and 2020.

Overall.in the manufacturing sector te number of jobs is higher than any other sector.while the agriculture sector provides minumum jobs among all sectors.

Firstly. The manufacturing sector is the most dominat sector it provide highest no approximetely 20 millions jobs in 1980 before declining to around 13 million jobs in 2020. however retail provide only 5 million jobs in 1960 afterward taking a rose to more than 15 million jobs in 2020

The healthcare sector was the minor sector in 1960, therefore it started increasing in no jobs from 1980 to 2020 peaking at more that 15 millions jobs in 2020. The remaing sector is agriculture which is most least sector in terms of providing no of jobs only around 5 million jobs were recorded in1960 it decline more till 2020 to around 1 million jobs

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several key movements, including manufacturing peaking at about 20 million in 1980 and then falling, and healthcare rising to around 16 million by 2020. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing was not higher than every other sector throughout the period, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million in 2020, compared with manufacturing at 13 million. Some figures are also imprecise, such as agriculture at about 1 million in 2020 rather than around 2 million, and retail at about 6 million in 1960 rather than 5 million. To strengthen the response, give a clearer overview of the contrasting trends and compare the sectors at the end of the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure, with an opening, an overview, and paragraphs describing the sectors. Grouping manufacturing and retail before healthcare and agriculture gives the reader some sense of organisation. However, progression within the description is uneven: the first paragraph focuses on manufacturing, then shifts to retail, while the next paragraph returns to healthcare and agriculture without clear links between the comparisons. Connectors such as “Firstly,” “however,” and “therefore” are used mechanically or do not express the relationship clearly. For example, “therefore” does not logically connect healthcare being the smallest sector in 1960 with its later rise. Use clearer sequencing and comparison phrases, and ensure each paragraph develops a coherent grouping of trends.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “declining,” “increasing,” “peaking,” and “recorded.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts of the account awkward or unclear. Phrases such as “taking a rose,” “most least sector,” and “minor sector” are not natural ways to describe the data; “rose” is also used in the wrong form in “taking a rose.” There are repeated informal or imprecise expressions such as “no jobs” and “provide jobs,” alongside misspellings including “dominant,” “minimum,” and “remaining.” Aim for accurate, consistent terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” “largest sector,” and “fell.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and more extended sentences, and the main trends can generally be understood. However, grammatical control is inconsistent, particularly in sentence boundaries, verb forms, agreement, and punctuation. For example, “Overall.in the manufacturing sector te number…” has incorrect punctuation and an incomplete transition, while “The manufacturing sector … it provide” joins ideas awkwardly and has subject–verb disagreement. The sentence beginning “The healthcare sector was the minor sector in 1960, therefore…” also joins clauses incorrectly. Capitalisation after full stops is inconsistent, and several sentences lack clear punctuation. Practise forming complete sentences with accurate verb agreement and use full stops or conjunctions to separate related clauses.

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