Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates that the number of jobs in US in four sectors of the economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, there are four jobs like as manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healtcare of the economy in the US.

First of all, in 1960 manufacturing industries provided 15 million jobs while its incrsed the job ratio in 1980, and also provide the 20 million jobs, afterall, it gradually slow down to 17million in 2000 and in 2020 is also down to 13 million. In 1960, agriculture provided 6 million job, therefor, gradually down in every 20years and in 2020 it s provide only 2 to 3 million jobs in US economy.

On the other hand, retail and heathcare also boost in every 20 years. Healthcare provided 2million jobs in 1960s,

while it rise every 20years. Now, in 2020 it provides 16 millions jobs in it. Retail also boost up from 1960 to 2000, but slow down in 2020 and provide it 16 millions jobs of the us economy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You report several accurate figures and trends: manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, while agriculture declines from 6 million to about 2 million. You also identify growth in retail and healthcare. However, the overview is not effective: “there are four jobs like as…” merely names the sectors rather than summarising the main changes. The comparison that healthcare and retail both reach 16 million in 2020 is useful, but the claim that retail “slow down” in 2020 is inaccurate; it continues to rise, from 15 million in 2000 to 16 million. Develop a clear overview of the contrasting trends and the leading sectors, and report the key comparisons more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about manufacturing and agriculture, then retail and healthcare. This gives the reader some organisation, and phrases such as “On the other hand” signal a contrast. However, progression is weakened because the overview repeats the introduction by listing the four sectors without stating the main pattern. Linking expressions are sometimes inaccurate or mechanical: “therefor” does not clearly connect the agriculture figures, and “afterall” is awkward in the manufacturing sequence. The final paragraph also shifts between healthcare and retail without a clear comparison. Group the declining sectors together and the growing sectors together, and use transitions that show the relationship between the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “provided,” “gradually,” “down,” and “boost,” so the main direction of change is usually understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices are informal or imprecise for an academic report. “Boost” and “boost up” are not natural descriptions of figures here, while “slow down” incorrectly suggests retail growth weakened or stopped. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “healtcare,” “incrsed,” and “therefor,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for precise trend language and consistent collocations, such as “rose,” “declined,” “reached,” and “employment in the sector.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some longer sentences, particularly when describing manufacturing’s rise and subsequent decline, but these structures are often faulty and the range remains limited. For example, “while its incrsed the job ratio in 1980, and also provide the 20 million jobs” has unclear clause structure and inconsistent verb forms. In “in 2020 is also down to 13 million,” the sentence lacks a clear subject, and “it s provide only 2 to 3 million jobs” has errors in agreement and verb form. Articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries also need attention. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses such as “before falling to…” or “whereas…”.

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