Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrate the economy of USA in the amount of jobs in different four sectors in 1960 and 2020

overall,it is evident that the manufecturing sector was the highest paid which showed decline trend over the period while retail and healthcare was significantly rose in both years.However,the least economy of agriculture sector over the period.

In 1960 manufecture jobs expenditure was 15 million which sharply inclined by 20 million in 1980 but it drastilcaly decreased till 2020.Moreover,Retail sector was 6 million in 1960 which significantly increased 15 million in 2020and reached to 16 million in 2020.In contrast,Health care was only 2 million in 1960 which showed the rapidly rose in 2000 by almost 11 million which reached to the same retail sector which is 15 million.

On the other hand,approximatly 6 million jobs in agricutre sector in 1960 while this sector raidly declined by 2 million over the period and it remained same till 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak and then declines, retail and healthcare grow, and agriculture falls. The overview also correctly recognises agriculture as the smallest sector by the end. However, some comparisons and figures are unclear or inaccurate. Retail reaches about 16 million in 2020, not 15 million in 2020 as stated; healthcare reaches about 16 million in 2020, rather than 15 million, and it does not match retail at 15 million in 2000. The manufacturing description omits its 2000 level, while the overview’s claim that it was the “highest paid” misrepresents jobs as wages. More precise reporting of the final rankings and key turning points would make the response more complete and clear.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph describing the sectors. This gives the reader a basic route through the information, and contrasts such as “In contrast” and “On the other hand” help signal comparisons. However, progression within the detail paragraph is sometimes difficult to follow, particularly where several years and figures are compressed into one sentence. The phrase “in 2020and reached” also obscures the sequence, and the healthcare comparison refers to “the same retail sector” without a clear time reference. Use one sentence per sector or group related trends, and make each comparison’s year explicit. This would make cohesion less mechanical and references easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “decline trend,” “increased,” “decreased,” and “over the period,” so the reader can generally identify the trends you intend to describe. However, the range and precision are limited by repeated basic verbs and several inaccurate or misspelled choices. “Highest paid” refers to wages rather than the number of jobs, while “jobs expenditure” does not describe employment figures. Forms such as “manufecturing,” “drastilcaly,” and “agricutre” also reduce accuracy. Choose vocabulary that directly describes quantities and movement, and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “peaked,” “fell,” and “employment” would help communicate the data naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses with “while” and “which,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, some sentence structures and verb forms are inaccurate. For example, “The line graph illustrate” needs subject–verb agreement, and “retail and healthcare was significantly rose” combines an incorrect agreement pattern with an unsuitable verb construction. The opening overview also lacks clear sentence boundaries after “overall” and “period.” In the detail paragraph, clauses joined by “which” sometimes have unclear references. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and agreement, and separate long sentences when the relationship between figures is not clear. These changes would improve control while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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