Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in 4 category of the economy in US between the 1960 upto 2020

firstly in the healthcare setup there is expo rise in job market which is also shown by the retail category in contrast the diagram shows the decrease in agriculture job followed by the manufacturing category although it show increase in the job around the 1980.

compare to rise in healthcare and retail jobs from 1960 to 2020. data shows that the the agriculture jobs were highest in the year of 1960 which comes down in 1980 but balanced upto 2000 then however show slight decrease in year 2020

the trend shows the manufacturing job were rise from 1960 to 1980 and held highest in graph for quite some time then fall down from 1980 to 2000and further decrease in 2020 .In year 2020 diagram shows the balane between health care and retail jobs

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks around 1980 before falling. The comparison that healthcare and retail reach similar levels in 2020 is also accurate. However, some key details are unclear or imprecise: manufacturing is described as having “held highest in graph for quite some time,” although it is overtaken by retail and healthcare by 2000, and the overview does not clearly state the final ranking or the scale of the changes. The agriculture account is broadly correct but could include its approximate values. To strengthen the response, give a clearer overview and support each trend with selected figures, while distinguishing the sectors’ different trajectories more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable sequence: it introduces the graph, summarises general trends, and then discusses agriculture and manufacturing before noting the 2020 comparison. This gives the reader some overall organisation. However, ideas are not consistently grouped or linked, and the opening trend summary is difficult to follow because several sectors are combined in one long sentence. Connectors such as “firstly,” “in contrast,” and “then however” are used awkwardly or without clear relationships, while the final sentence arrives abruptly. Use distinct paragraphs for the overview and detailed comparisons, and organise the body by related trends—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise referencing would improve progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “decrease,” “trend,” “rise,” and “balanced,” and the reader can generally identify which sectors you mean. However, the range is limited and several choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “expo rise,” “healthcare setup,” “held highest,” and “balanced” for two sectors reaching the same level. Repetition of “job” and “shows” also makes the description less precise. Choose standard graph language and use sector-specific terms consistently, such as “employment,” “number of jobs,” “peaked,” and “declined.” More accurate word forms and spelling would make the account easier to understand and more appropriate for an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There are attempts to combine ideas using clauses and contrast, for example, “although it show increase in the job around the 1980,” but control is limited and errors recur. Verb forms and agreement are often inaccurate (“the manufacturing job were rise”; “it show”), and articles, plurals, and prepositions are frequently missing or misplaced. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also weak: the response begins a new sentence with “firstly” without a capital letter, and several long sentences run together. These problems sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions and build shorter, complete sentences first, then add controlled clauses such as “while” or “whereas.”

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