Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the graph gives the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of economy in US from the year 1960 to 2020 now we have to tell that number of jobs decreases or increases

first of all i would have to say that the number of manufacuring jobs is at 15% in 1960 and it increases in 1980 but after that it decreases in 2020 it is about 13% and the number of retail jobs is at 6% in 1960 and after that it increases and it is about 16% in 2020

now i would have to say that the number of agriculture jobs is at 6% in 1960 and after that it decreases and it is about 2% in 2020 and the number of healthcare jobs is about 2% in 1960 and after that it increases and it is about 16% in 2020

the number of different department of jobs also increases and decreases in different years

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the four sectors and report their broad directions: manufacturing rises before falling, agriculture declines, and retail and healthcare increase. However, the response gives only a limited account of the graph and lacks a clear overview of its main comparisons. For example, it does not state that manufacturing is the largest sector in 1960 and 1980, or that retail and healthcare reach joint-highest levels by 2020. Some details are also imprecise: the figures are jobs in millions, not percentages, and the manufacturing peak in 1980 is not quantified. The final sentence is too general to add useful information. The response is one word below the required 150 words; develop the overview and key comparisons rather than adding filler.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic sequence: it introduces the graph and then discusses the four sectors, which makes the general subject understandable. However, progression is limited because the information is presented as a series of similar statements, repeatedly beginning with phrases such as “first of all” and “now i would have to say.” There is no distinct overview paragraph, and the final sentence about jobs increasing and decreasing repeats information without summarising a meaningful pattern. Grouping the sectors by trend—for example, declining agriculture and manufacturing after its peak, followed by growth in retail and healthcare—would create clearer progression. Use a concise introduction, an overview, and logically organised detail paragraphs, with linking expressions used selectively.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is sufficient to identify the sectors and describe basic movement, using terms such as “increases,” “decreases,” and “about.” However, the range is limited and repetitive, and some choices are inaccurate for this graph. In particular, “15%” and “6%” incorrectly present the figures as percentages; the vertical axis shows jobs in millions. “Number of different department of jobs” is also unclear and does not express a precise comparison. Spelling errors such as “manufacuring” and the repeated informal phrase “i would have to say” reduce control. Use accurate units and a wider set of trend and comparison terms, such as “peaked,” “declined,” “rose steadily,” and “overtook,” where supported by the data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You communicate the main trends through simple clauses, and several sentences use “and” or “after that” to connect related information. However, the sentence structures are repetitive, with little variety beyond repeated “the number of … jobs is” patterns. Errors in sentence boundaries and punctuation are noticeable: the opening runs into “now we have to tell” without a full stop, and the response has no sentence-initial capitalisation. There are also problems with articles and phrasing, as in “four sectors of economy in US,” and the final sentence has an unclear grammatical construction. Practise writing complete, punctuated sentences and varying structures, for example by using clauses with “while” or “whereas” to compare trends.

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