Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph shows the figures of employment oppertunities in four main sectors_ manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the job vacancies increased for healthcare and retail departments. In contrast agriculture job opertunities shows the lower employment rate through out the years and manufacture's job sites shows a minimal inclined but then dropped in 2020.

On one hand, the number of jobs were same for agriculture and retail deparment on about 6 million in 1960 but later on they both shows an opposite trend where retail jobs inclined to approximately 16 million in 2020. Meanwhile, agriculture labour's vacancies minimize to 2.5 million.

In Addition, manufactures jobs at highest in number among other at 15 million in 1960 and later on it inclined to 20 million in 1980 but then their available positions get declined to 13 million in 2020. However, Healthcare is the only department which had lowest employment rate in 1960 about 3 million but it shows a very steep exclavation about 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the four sectors and give a clear overview of the main contrasts: retail and healthcare rise, agriculture remains the smallest, and manufacturing peaks before declining. Several key figures are also reported accurately, including manufacturing’s rise to 20 million in 1980 and its fall to 13 million by 2020, as well as retail reaching about 16 million. This covers the task well, though some details are less precise: healthcare starts at about 2 million, not 3 million, and agriculture is about 2 million in 2020. The description of manufacturing as showing a “minimal inclined” is also unclear, since it first rises substantially. More precise comparisons across the four years would make the account more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two detail paragraphs. The contrast signalled by “In contrast” helps the overview, and “Meanwhile” and “However” guide the reader through comparisons. However, some linking is mechanical or does not clearly express the relationship between ideas. “On one hand” is not followed by a corresponding “on the other hand,” and “In Addition” begins a paragraph that mainly shifts to another sector rather than adding a clearly connected point. The grouping of agriculture with retail is useful initially, but the later paragraph moves between manufacturing and healthcare without a clear comparison. Organise details by trends or by time period, and use references that make each comparison explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary relevant to describing trends, including “increased,” “opposite trend,” “declined,” and “steep.” However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for this chart, such as “employment opportunities,” “job sites,” “labour’s vacancies,” and “exclavation.” These expressions sometimes make the intended meaning harder to follow, and spelling errors such as “oppertunities” and “opertunities” are noticeable. Prefer standard chart language and use it consistently: “number of jobs,” “employment,” “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable.” Also avoid calling the figures “job vacancies,” as the graph reports jobs rather than vacancies. More accurate collocations would improve clarity and precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and attempts at longer, more complex structures, for example, “Overall, the job vacancies increased for healthcare and retail departments. In contrast…” and the sentence beginning “On one hand.” The main trends are generally understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “agriculture job opertunities shows” and “they both shows”; articles and plurals are also awkward in “the number of jobs were same” and “manufactures jobs at highest.” The phrase “it inclined” uses an unsuitable verb pattern, while “through out” should be written as one word. Review agreement, articles, and sentence construction, especially when combining comparisons. Greater control of these patterns would make the varied sentence forms clearer.

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