Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The graph gives the information about the trends of jobs in 4 different sectors in US between 1960 and 2020. Jobs in the healthcare and retail industry has significantly increased from 1960 to 2020 but manufacturing industry has reduced the employment in 2020 while agriculture sector remains almost same during these two years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the broad direction of change in three sectors, but the response does not adequately summarise the graph. It gives no figures or comparisons between sectors, and it omits the key pattern that manufacturing peaked in 1980 before declining, while retail and healthcare rose to become the joint largest sectors by 2020. The claim that agriculture “remains almost same” is also misleading: employment fell from about 6 million to 2 million over the period. The response is substantially below the required 150 words, leaving the main features unsupported and the task only minimally addressed. To improve, include a clear overview and select several accurate figures to illustrate the major trends and comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic, understandable order: it introduces the graph and then gives a brief summary of trends. The contrast introduced by “but” helps connect the manufacturing point to the preceding increases. However, the whole report is compressed into two sentences, so there is no developed progression from an overview to supporting details, and the reader cannot follow comparisons across the four sectors. The second sentence also groups several trends together without separating or explaining them. Organise the report into a short introduction, an overview, and one or two detail paragraphs, using clear links such as “By contrast” and “Meanwhile” to guide comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “trends,” “increased,” and “reduced,” and the general meaning is understandable. However, the range is very limited, with repeated reliance on broad terms such as “jobs” and “industry.” Some expressions are imprecise or unnatural: “the information about the trends of jobs” and “remains almost same” do not describe the data clearly. More precise language would help distinguish employment levels, rises, falls, and peaks. For example, describe the number of jobs as “employment” or “employment levels,” and use “declined steadily” for agriculture or “peaked in 1980” for manufacturing. This would make the summary more accurate and appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response communicates its main point using a simple introductory sentence and a longer sentence with a contrast, but the grammatical range is narrow and there are noticeable errors. In “Jobs in the healthcare and retail industry has significantly increased,” the plural subject requires “have,” and “industry” should be plural or the sectors should be named separately. The phrase “manufacturing industry has reduced the employment” also uses an incorrect subject–verb relationship: employment, rather than the industry, declined. In “agriculture sector,” an article is needed (“the agriculture sector”). Aim for accurate subject–verb agreement and articles, and practise combining accurate simple sentences with clauses that compare trends.

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