Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the economy of the United states from the number of employements in four different sectors from 1960 to 2020. The unit is measured in millions. It is evident that the retail and healthcare jobs had gradually increased, whereas manufacturing and agriculture jobs has decreased in number over the given period of time as comapred to other jobs.

In 1960, the number of jobs in healthcare were minimum at 2 millions as compared to other jobs which were above 5 millions. But later, this jobs significantly increased in number and reached little above 15millions by the year 2020. Similarly, the number of jobs in retail started with almost 6 millions and considerably inclined and reached at the same level as healthcare over the given period.

In contrast, the number of jobs in manufacturing were the highest in the year 1960 at 15 millions as compared to other jobs which maintained the highest employments rate for next 40 years. But later from 2000 to 2020 the employments rate reached at below 15 millions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between rising employment in retail and healthcare and falling employment in agriculture, and you include several relevant figures, such as healthcare at about 2 million initially and manufacturing at 15 million in 1960. However, the overview is incomplete and partly inaccurate: manufacturing did not decrease throughout, as it rose to 20 million in 1980 before falling, while agriculture’s decline is not described in the body. The claim that manufacturing maintained the highest employment for the next 40 years is also incorrect, since retail overtook it by 2000. To strengthen the report, give a clearer overview of the main changes and compare the four sectors accurately across the key years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about healthcare and retail, then manufacturing. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, the progression is incomplete because agriculture is omitted from the detailed account, and the final paragraph does not connect the sector comparisons clearly. Linking phrases such as “In contrast” and “Similarly” are relevant, but some references are vague—for example, “this jobs” does not clearly identify the subject—and “other jobs” is used without specifying which sectors are being compared. Organise the body around the main trends, and use explicit comparisons and clear references to make the relationships between figures easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some appropriate task vocabulary, including “line graph,” “sectors,” “increased,” and “reached,” and the reader can generally understand the intended trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the report less natural. For example, “number of employements” is not the right expression, “inclined” does not mean increased in this context, and “employments rate” is an unsuitable phrase for the number of jobs. There are also spelling errors such as “comapred” and “United states.” Use precise terms such as “employment,” “rose,” and “number of jobs,” and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast clause beginning “whereas” and a time clause beginning “as compared to.” The main trends are usually understandable, but errors in agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence construction are frequent enough to make the writing less controlled. Examples include “jobs has decreased,” “the number of jobs … were minimum,” and “this jobs significantly increased.” The phrase “reached at the same level” also shows an incorrect grammatical pattern. Practise matching verbs to the subject (“jobs have,” but “the number has”) and forming comparisons with accurate structures, such as “reached the same level as.” Careful proofreading would improve clarity.

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