Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the line graph shows the number of jobs in four different sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020. overall the number of jobs retail and manufacturing and healthcare increased during this period while manufacturing and agriculture showed different trends. manufacturing had the highest number of jobs at the beginning but healthcare and retail increased over time, agriculture had the lowestfigures in the later years.in 1960:manufacturing had about 15 millions jobs making it the largest sector this figure rose to 20 million in 1980 however it then decreased to around 17 milllionin 2000 and most recently 13 million in 2020 . helalthcare also experienced a significant increase. in contrast agriculture decreased from around six million jobs in 1960 to 3 million in 1980 it remained at about 3 million in 2000 before falling to just 2 million in 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the graph’s subject and include several relevant figures, especially manufacturing’s rise to 20 million before declining and agriculture’s fall from 6 million to 2 million. However, the response only partially covers the data: healthcare is described as increasing, but its figures and endpoint are omitted, and retail is not discussed at all. The overview is also unclear and internally inconsistent: it says manufacturing increased overall, although it ended below its 1960 level, and refers to manufacturing twice where agriculture appears to be intended. The response is 140 words, below the required 150. To improve, give a clear overview of all four sectors and report the main changes and comparisons, particularly the convergence of retail and healthcare at about 16 million in 2020.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic sequence from an introduction and overview to details about manufacturing and agriculture, and phrases such as “however” and “in contrast” help signal changes. Nevertheless, the progression is incomplete because retail is omitted and healthcare receives only a brief, unsupported mention. The overview’s repeated sector names make the relationships difficult to follow, while the body moves between sectors without a fully developed comparison. Several ideas are run together, for example the overview’s “later years.in 1960” and the long manufacturing sentence. Use separate, clearly punctuated paragraphs for the overview and details, and organise the body by contrasting rising sectors with declining ones.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “rose,” “decreased,” “remained,” “falling,” and “significant increase.” These choices communicate the main movements, but the range is limited and some phrasing is imprecise or repetitive, such as “different trends” and “the largest sector.” There are also noticeable spelling and form errors, including “milllion” and “helalthcare,” which reduce the accuracy of the presentation. Aim for more precise comparisons and varied trend language, while checking spelling carefully. For example, distinguish a sector’s peak from its final figure, and use terms such as “declined steadily” or “overtook” only where the data supports them.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt some complex sentence forms, including “this figure rose to 20 million in 1980 however it then decreased,” and the reader can generally understand the intended trends. However, sentence control is uneven: punctuation is often missing, and several clauses are joined without clear boundaries. The overview also contains a confusing construction—“the number of jobs retail and manufacturing and healthcare increased”—and the opening lacks capitalisation. Use complete sentences with clear subjects and conjunctions, and punctuate contrast clauses correctly. For example, separate the manufacturing peak and subsequent decline with a full stop or semicolon. A final proofread for sentence boundaries, capital letters, and consistent past-tense reporting would improve accuracy.

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