Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph depicts the information about the number of jobs in a differents sectors of the economy in the united state of Amarica from 1960 and 2020.

Overall, after a quick glance, it is clearly seen that, Although, number of jobs availible on high in manufacturing sectors 1960, but the end 2020 retails stoctors jobs was higher then other sectors.

Observingly, in 1960 healthcare jobs were 3 millions after some time later 1980 it was approximentaly 5 millions it had sharply increased 15 millions till 2020.

On the other hand, agriculture sectors in the starting year 1960 it was 6 millions job availible till 1980 its suddenly getting droped 3 millions and remained simller until 2000, after that it had been dec

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the broad comparison that manufacturing was highest at the start and retail was among the leading sectors by 2020, and you describe agriculture’s decline. However, the response covers only part of the graph and is under the required 150 words, so several key trends are missing or unfinished. The healthcare figures are misreported: it rises from about 2 million in 1960 to 5 million in 1980, then 11 million in 2000 and 16 million in 2020, not 3 million followed by 15 million. The final agriculture sentence is cut off, and manufacturing and retail changes are not adequately reported. Include a clear overview and accurate comparisons across all four sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is some organisation: an introductory sentence is followed by an overview and then details about healthcare and agriculture. The paragraphing helps distinguish these functions, and phrases such as “On the other hand” signal a contrast. However, progression is limited because the response ends mid-sentence (“it had been dec”), leaving the final detail incomplete and the account unbalanced. Some linking is also awkward or unclear, as in “after some time later 1980” and “in the starting year 1960.” Group the sectors into a clearer sequence, use straightforward time markers such as “By 1980” and “From 2000 to 2020,” and ensure each sentence is complete.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “manufacturing,” “agriculture,” “increased,” and “remained,” so the reader can recognise the subject and basic trends. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, spelling, and collocation errors make parts difficult to understand: “a differents sectors,” “retails stoctors,” “availible,” and “suddenly getting droped.” “Jobs were 3 millions” is also an unnatural way to express the figure. Use accurate sector names and standard chart language, for example, “the number of jobs,” “employment in retail,” “fell sharply,” and “remained stable.” Proofreading spelling and choosing natural collocations would make your descriptions clearer and more precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a contrast between the sectors and a sentence describing change over time. However, control is inconsistent, and several sentences contain errors in structure, tense, agreement, or punctuation. For example, “Although, number of jobs availible on high in manufacturing sectors 1960” lacks a complete grammatical structure, while “agriculture sectors in the starting year 1960 it was…” has an unclear subject and faulty clause construction. The healthcare sentence also combines time references awkwardly. Use complete subject–verb sentences, maintain past tense for the historical data, and punctuate clauses carefully. Shorter, accurate sentences would be a useful foundation before adding more complex comparisons.

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