Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Out of the four sectors mentioned, two have grown over time and two seemed to decline. Starting with the Manufacturing sector, in 1960 there were about 15 million jobs in the sector which, in 1980, rose to 20 million, but starting declining and by the year 2000 there were about 17 million jobs remaning. The number got reduced even more to about 13 million in 2020.

For retail, the trend was opposite and it started with 6 million jobs in 1960, rose to 10 million in 1980 and 15 million in 2000. The growth became minimal after this year, and rose to about 16 million jobs in 2020.

The healthcare sector showed the most growth, with about 2.5 million jobs in 1960 to 16 million in 2020, which means about 13.5 million jobs created in 60 years.

However, the Agriculture sector showed a decline in number of jobs. It started low already with about 6 million jobs and declined to 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the broad contrast between growing and declining sectors and report several key figures accurately, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million and its fall to 13 million, and retail’s rise to 16 million. The overview is present, and your comparison that healthcare showed the strongest growth is relevant. However, some features are less fully reported: healthcare is given only at the start and end, while agriculture’s intermediate values are omitted. The healthcare starting figure is also slightly high (about 2.5 million rather than about 2 million), and saying agriculture “declined to 2 million” skips its plateau at around 3 million from 1980 to 2000. A clearer overview of the final ranking and more complete trend descriptions would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is arranged in a clear sequence, with separate paragraphs for manufacturing, retail, healthcare and agriculture. This makes the sector-by-sector comparisons easy to follow, and linking phrases such as “Starting with,” “For retail,” and “However” help signal movement between points. The opening also gives a useful broad contrast. At times, though, the organisation feels like a list of sectors rather than a comparison of related trends; for example, healthcare and retail both rise strongly but are not discussed together. Some links are also slightly mechanical, and “However” does not establish a strong contrast with the preceding healthcare sentence. Grouping the rising sectors and the declining sector, while using clearer comparisons, would create more flexible progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task vocabulary, including “rose,” “decline,” “trend,” “growth,” and “jobs created,” and the meaning is generally clear. There is some variation in how changes are described, rather than relying on one verb throughout. However, several choices are imprecise or awkward for formal data reporting: “the growth became minimal” is less natural than describing the increase as slowing, and “the number got reduced” is informal and vague. “Remaning” is also misspelled, and “two have grown over time” oversimplifies the series because manufacturing rises before falling. More precise trend language and careful proofreading would improve control and flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses linked with “which” and “but,” and most of the information remains understandable. Some sentences are controlled well, such as the retail sequence describing the rise from 6 to 15 million. However, there are occasional grammatical problems in longer constructions. In “in 1960 there were about 15 million jobs in the sector which, in 1980, rose to 20 million,” the relative clause is awkwardly attached and makes the subject of “rose” unclear. “With about 2.5 million jobs in 1960 to 16 million” is also an incomplete comparison structure; use “rising from … to …”. More accurate clause construction and a wider range of reliably controlled sentences would strengthen the response.

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