Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph shows the information of the four sectors of the economy in US between 1960 and 2020 where the agriculture industry keept higher number of jobs among other industries.

The graph demonstrates the increase in the number of jobs in manufacturing industry from 1960 to 1980. After that from 1980 to 2020 it kept falling. On the other hand the number of jobs in retail industry kept increasing between 1960 to 2020. Whereas the healthcare industry shows an intensive higher number of job from 1960 to 2020. Lastly the number of jobs in agriculture industry has kept downword means decreases from 1960 to 2020.

The comparisons should be make on manufacturing industry and healthcare industry. Because the graph is showing that manufacturing industry's number of jobs are relatively decreasing all the years where the healthcare industry keep increasing there number of jobs over the years.

In conclusion, there is a significant diffrerence between manufacturing sector and healthcare sector in terms of number of jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several broad trends: manufacturing rises to 1980 and then falls, while retail and healthcare increase and agriculture declines. However, the opening claim that agriculture had the highest number of jobs is incorrect; it was among the lowest throughout. The response also does not give figures or make clear comparisons across the four sectors, and the statement that manufacturing falls “all the years” conflicts with its initial rise. The overview is therefore incomplete and partly inaccurate, while the final comparison between manufacturing and healthcare is not supported with data. To strengthen the report, select the main turning points and end values—for example, manufacturing peaks at about 20 million, while retail and healthcare reach roughly 16 million by 2020—and describe how their rankings change.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, a paragraph describing trends, a comparison paragraph and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “After that,” “On the other hand” and “Lastly” help signal movement between points. However, progression is weakened by repetition: the manufacturing–healthcare contrast is stated in the third paragraph and repeated in the conclusion, while the comparison paragraph does not add specific evidence. Some links are awkward or incomplete, particularly “Whereas the healthcare industry…” and “Because the graph is showing…,” which make the relationships between ideas less clear. Grouping related trends and using comparisons to connect them would create a more coherent report.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “manufacturing,” “retail,” “agriculture,” “increasing” and “decreases,” so the general subject is clear. There is some repetition of “number of jobs” and “industry,” and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a graph, such as “information of,” “intensive higher number,” and “kept downword.” Spelling errors including “keept” and “diffrerence” also reduce accuracy. These choices do not prevent the reader from understanding the main topic, but they limit precision and fluency. Aim for standard trend language and accurate collocations, such as “employment rose,” “declined steadily,” and “reached a peak,” while checking spelling and avoiding repeated phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including contrasts introduced by “On the other hand” and “Whereas,” and most of the intended meaning can be followed. However, sentence structures are often incomplete or awkward: “Whereas the healthcare industry shows…” is a dependent clause without a complete main clause, and “Because the graph is showing…” is also left as a fragment. There are also errors in agreement and possessive forms, as in “manufacturing industry's number of jobs are,” and in the construction “keep increasing there number.” Use complete clauses, check subject–verb agreement, and form comparisons with a clear subject and verb. More controlled complex sentences would improve accuracy without sacrificing variety.

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