Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This graph basically demostrate the jobs in four sectors of the economy in th US between 1960 and 2020. Manufacturing participates pretty much high in 1960 double than agriculture and retail, and gradually increasing and was at peak level in 1980. Then having a slight decrease which drop them lower than the value in 1960. Whereas healthcare was at least point among 4 in 1960 and steadily increase until 1980 and then boomed in the end of 2020 with standing equal to retail and abover agriculture and manufacture. Agriculture starts as 5 millions as same as retail but gently decrease until 2020 with the lowest between them. Retail start with agriculture with moderately increase until 2000 and minimal increase between 2000 till 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify the four sectors and report several key trends, including manufacturing peaking in 1980, healthcare rising, and agriculture declining to the lowest level. However, some comparisons are inaccurate or unclear: manufacturing was not double retail in 1960 (15 million versus 6 million), and healthcare and retail were approximately equal only in 2020. The response also lacks a clear, concise overview of the main changes and gives few precise figures to support its account. It contains 115 words, below the required 150; the eight words copied from the prompt are excluded from that count. Develop the overview and add accurate figures for the main turning points and end values.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response follows a broadly chronological pattern and uses contrast markers such as “Whereas” and “Then,” so the reader can identify some movement across the period. However, it is presented as one paragraph, with no clear separation between an overview and supporting details. Several links are awkward or unclear, particularly “Then having a slight decrease which drop them lower” and “with standing equal to retail,” making the progression difficult to follow. The repeated sequence of sector-by-sector statements also limits comparison between trends. Organise the response into a brief introduction, an overview, and grouped detail paragraphs, and use clear links to show how the sectors compare.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant trend vocabulary, including “peak level,” “steadily increase,” “decrease,” and “moderately increase,” which helps communicate the general direction of change. There is some variety, but several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a graph: “participates pretty much high,” “boomed in the end,” and “gently decrease” do not express the trends precisely. Spelling errors such as “demostrate,” “abover,” and “manufacture” also reduce accuracy. Aim for standard, precise collocations and consistent sector names; for example, describe a figure as “rose to a peak” or “declined gradually,” rather than using conversational phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, using forms such as “Whereas healthcare…” and “until 1980 and then…”. However, the range is limited and many sentences contain errors that make relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “Manufacturing participates pretty much high” lacks a suitable verb construction, while “Then having a slight decrease which drop them” is an incomplete and faulty clause. Tense and agreement are also inconsistent, as in “Retail start” and “Agriculture starts.” Practise complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past-tense forms consistently when reporting this historical data. Check punctuation and sentence boundaries as you revise.
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