Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the comparison of the number of vacancies available in millions in four sectors namely, manufacturing, retail, agriculture and helathcare in America for the 60year period spanning from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, there are two industries( healthcare and retail) that showed growth and the need to employ more people. Healthcare recorded the greatest growth surpursing all the other industries and catching up to the retail industry.However agriculture and manufacturing reported a downsize in their industries with the later being toppled from being the largest industry by retail and thereafter healthcare overtook it to end at third position.

In 1960 the healthcare industry employed close to 2.5million staff making it the smallest industry

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and give a relevant overview: healthcare and retail grew, while agriculture and manufacturing declined overall. You also note healthcare’s strong rise and the changing ranking of the sectors. However, the response addresses the graph only partially: it ends after one detail about 1960, so the main changes across 1980, 2000 and 2020 are not reported, and most series lack supporting figures. The statement that healthcare “catch[es] up to the retail industry” is broadly consistent with both ending at about 16 million, but the final ranking is not fully explained. The response is also 35 words below the required minimum. Include a complete account of the key trends and comparisons, with selected data points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to an overview and then a detail paragraph. The overview groups the rising sectors against the declining ones, which gives the reader a useful organising idea. However, the final paragraph is incomplete and contains only one data point, so the report has no clear progression through the period or balanced coverage of the four lines. Some linking is present, such as “Overall” and “However,” but the long overview sentence joins several comparisons without clear separation, and “thereafter” does not make the sequence especially easy to follow. Develop the body in chronological or sector-based order, and use separate sentences to make each comparison clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “industries,” “recorded the greatest growth,” “overtook,” and “end at third position.” These choices help communicate the broad trends and show some willingness to use less common language. However, several expressions are imprecise or unnatural for describing a graph: “vacancies available” suggests unfilled posts rather than the number of jobs, and “downsize in their industries” is not a natural description of a falling figure. There are also spelling errors in “helathcare” and “surpursing.” Prefer precise terms such as “number of jobs” and “declined,” and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “industries … that showed growth” and a contrast introduced by “However.” The main ideas remain understandable, but some errors and punctuation problems reduce control. For example, “the later being toppled” has an unclear grammatical reference, and “In 1960 the healthcare industry employed close to 2.5million staff making it the smallest industry” needs clearer punctuation and sentence completion. Spacing around brackets and full stops is also inconsistent, and the opening sentence has awkward construction around “namely.” Use shorter, complete sentences for the comparisons, check articles and clause structure, and punctuate introductory phrases and added details consistently.

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