Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates changes in the numbers of job in this four sectors of the US economy manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare between 1960 and 2020. with figures given in millions.

Overall, employment in Health care and retail increased considerably, whereas manufacturing experienced a decline after reaching peak in 1980. In contrast, agriculture was the only sector to show an overall downward trend.

In 1960, manufacturing was the highest employment sector with approximately 15 millions job. The figure then rose to peak of 20 million in 1980 before declining steadily to around 13 million by 2020. In contrast, health care only the job which had rapidly fell, it beginning with 6 millions and and it started decreasing during the 1980 and 2000 it was stable and then it slightly fell.

Although, healthcare was lowest beginner compare to all of the job it beginning with 2 millions jobs, it was the highest increasing graph. In 2020, it arrived mor than 16 millions. the number of jobs in the retail sector increased steadily from 5 million in 1960 to 15 million in 2000, before remaining stable at around 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main overall patterns: retail and healthcare rise, manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then falls, and agriculture declines overall. You also report several relevant figures, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million and its fall to about 13 million. However, the account of healthcare is seriously confused: you say it “rapidly fell” and describe a decline, although it rises from about 2 million to 16 million. Agriculture receives no detailed figures or period-by-period description, and the opening comparison of sector levels is therefore incomplete. To make the summary more complete and accurate, describe each series’ direction and key stages clearly, especially healthcare’s strong growth and agriculture’s fall from 6 to 2 million.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details, and it uses contrast markers such as “Overall” and “In contrast.” This gives the reader some sense of how the information is organised. However, progression is weakened by the contradictory healthcare account: the sentence beginning “In contrast, health care…” describes a fall, then the next paragraph calls it the fastest-rising graph. The paragraphing also separates related comparisons, while agriculture is mentioned in the overview but not developed later. Some linking phrases, including “Although” and “In contrast,” do not clearly express the relationship between the ideas that follow. Group the trends consistently and use transitions that accurately signal comparison or contrast.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased considerably,” “declining steadily,” “peak,” and “overall downward trend,” which helps communicate changes over time. However, the range is limited and several word choices or combinations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “highest increasing graph,” “lowest beginner,” and “arrived more than 16 millions.” Repetition of “job” and “number of jobs” also makes the description less precise. Use standard expressions for data, such as “employment,” “the figure,” “reached,” and “rose to,” and check that the chosen verb matches the trend being described. More accurate collocations would make the report clearer and more appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and longer sentences, including a complex overview with “whereas” and a time sequence using “before.” However, errors are frequent and sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. For example, “health care only the job which had rapidly fell” lacks a clear grammatical structure, and “it beginning with 6 millions” has problems with verb form and sentence construction. There are also errors in articles, agreement, plurals and punctuation, as in “a peak,” “15 millions job,” and the lowercase sentence beginning “the number.” Aim first for accurate basic clauses, then build longer sentences with controlled connectors. Proofread each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

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