Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. There is a comparison between four sectors i.e Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare. The Graph is between Jobs in million VS Year. In 1960, Healthcare was at least in terms of jobs, Manufacturing was at its peak while Agriculture and Retail were at same pace. In 1980, Healthcare graph increases while agriculture graph decreases, Retail has impactful increase while manufacturing was at its peak in this year. Later in early 2000's, Healthcare has a very remarkable progress and so as Retail, Agriculture remain almost same as before while Manufacturing face a decrease in jobs. In latest 2020, Healthcare nad Retail has progressed greatly, Agriculture has no progressed still remain same as before while Manufacturing again experienced decrease in jobs. That's how every sector has its own timeline as shown in this graph.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify all four sectors and describe several broad trends, including manufacturing’s rise and subsequent decline, agriculture’s fall, and growth in healthcare and retail. However, the response does not give a clear, accurate overview of the main comparisons: by 2020, healthcare and retail were joint highest at about 16 million, while agriculture was lowest at about 2 million. Some details are vague or inaccurate; for example, manufacturing was not at its peak in 1960, since it rose from 15 million to 20 million by 1980. The response is also 19 words below the 150-word minimum, which limits the detail available. Add a concise overview and support it with accurate figures and comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response follows the timeline from 1960 to 2020, so the reader can generally follow the sequence of changes. However, it is presented as one paragraph, with no clear separation between an overview and the detailed account. The repeated opening phrases “In 1980,” “Later in early 2000’s,” and “In latest 2020” make the progression feel mechanical, while links such as “while” and “while” in the final sentence do not always clarify the relationships between sectors. The concluding sentence, “That’s how every sector has its own timeline,” adds little. Organise the response into an overview and two detail paragraphs, and use comparisons to connect related trends.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary such as “jobs,” “sectors,” “increase,” “decreases,” and “progressed,” and the reader can understand the general direction of most trends. However, the range is limited and several choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing data. “At the same pace” does not clearly express that agriculture and retail had the same number of jobs, and “impactful increase” and “remarkable progress” are not natural chart-reporting collocations. “Healthcare nad Retail” also contains a spelling error. Aim for precise terms such as “rose,” “declined,” “remained stable,” and “reached,” and use “employment” or “number of jobs” consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas in longer sentences, for example by using “while” to contrast sector trends, and the main meaning is usually recoverable. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences awkward. Examples include “Healthcare was at least in terms of jobs,” which lacks a clear grammatical comparison, and “Agriculture remain almost same as before,” where subject–verb agreement and article use are faulty. In “Healthcare and Retail has progressed,” the plural subject requires a plural verb. There are also inconsistent capitalisation and punctuation choices. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build shorter, controlled comparison sentences before combining them.

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