Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The lines graph illustrates about the number of jobs in the different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the lines graph gives the numbers of jobs in the different four sectors such as, Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare, of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.

First of all, the manufacturing sector gave 15 million jobs in 1960 or the jobs are increased 5 million in 1980 year, But the next five years jobs are decreased continously 4 million approximantely or the next five years same situation is happened, the jobs are decreased 4 million approximantely.

Secondly, the retail sector gives the jobs in 1960 is 6 million, and the jobs are continously increased in the 40 years the numbers sre 15 million and the next five years 1 million jobs increased approximantely.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the chart’s subject and reports some accurate manufacturing and retail figures: manufacturing rises from 15 million to 20 million, then falls to about 13 million, while retail increases from 6 million to 15 million and then 16 million. However, it omits agriculture and healthcare entirely, and gives no clear overview of the main patterns or comparisons across all four sectors. The manufacturing account also misstates the timing: the chart shows changes at the 20-year intervals, not “the next five years.” The response is 122 words, below the required 150, which limits its coverage. To improve, add a concise overview and report the key trends for every sector, using the chart’s actual years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: the response begins with an introduction, follows with an overall statement, and then uses “First of all” and “Secondly” to separate manufacturing from retail. This gives the reader a simple sequence. However, the overview largely repeats the introduction rather than summarising the main trends, and the response stops after retail, so there is no complete progression through the chart. Linking is also repetitive and sometimes awkward, particularly the repeated use of “the jobs” and “the next five years.” Organise the body into clear comparisons—for example, manufacturing and agriculture together, then retail and healthcare—and use transitions that show contrast or change over time.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses relevant chart vocabulary, including “sector,” “jobs,” “increased,” and “decreased,” and names the four categories in the introduction. This is enough to communicate the general topic, but the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate or repetitive. For example, “the lines graph” is repeated, “gave 15 million jobs” is an unnatural collocation, and “approximantely” is misspelled. “Continously” and “sre” also contain spelling errors. Use more precise reporting language such as “employment stood at,” “rose to,” and “declined to,” and vary references to employment and the sectors. Accurate spelling and natural collocations would make the data description clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can generally identify the intended figures. However, control is inconsistent, especially in longer sentences. For instance, “the jobs are increased 5 million in 1980 year” has an incorrect verb form and missing grammatical elements, while “the retail sector gives the jobs in 1960 is 6 million” combines incompatible sentence patterns. Tense also shifts between past and present (“gave,” “are increased,” “gives”), and punctuation and capitalisation are unreliable, as in “But” after a comma. Practise concise past-tense reporting sentences, such as “Manufacturing employment rose from 15 million in 1960 to 20 million in 1980,” before combining ideas with accurate clauses.

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