Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph represents the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy i.e. Manufacturing, retail, agriculture and Healthcare between 1960 and 2020.

Manufacturing was the highest sector among the four sectors with most maximum number of jobs since the begining, though, it started to decline in the later years. While the sector with the least number of jobs gained in number by the year 2020.

In 1960 Manufacturing sector had around fifteen million jobs, while Retail and Agriculture had more than five million jobs. Healthcare being last in line was stuck between zero to five million jobs.

Later by 1980, Manufacturing, Retail and Healthcare sector boosted in job numbers while only agriculture lost in numbers. Retail and Healthcare continued to increase in numbers approaching more than fifteen million in each sector. On the other hand, the number of jobs in Manufacturing and Argiculture sector declined over time with the most decline occuring in manufacturing sector. From fifteen million to approximately 12.5 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the four sectors and report several relevant patterns, including manufacturing’s early lead, agriculture’s decline, and growth in retail and healthcare. The opening-year figures are mostly accurate, and you note manufacturing’s later fall. However, the overview is not fully reliable: manufacturing was not the highest sector throughout, since by 2020 retail and healthcare had both reached about 16 million, above manufacturing at roughly 13 million. The account also says retail and healthcare approached more than 15 million but does not clearly report their final values or compare their rise with manufacturing’s decline. Develop the overview around the main changes and give accurate endpoint comparisons; some trends are covered more fully than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a broad summary, and paragraphs describing the figures and later trends. Time markers such as “In 1960” and “Later by 1980” help the reader follow the chronology, while “On the other hand” signals contrast. However, the progression is not always clear. The second paragraph’s claim that manufacturing was the highest “since the beginning” conflicts with the later figures, and the final paragraph moves between increases and declines without consistently anchoring each comparison to a year. Some linking is also mechanical, particularly the repeated “sector” and “numbers.” Organise the body by contrasting rising sectors with declining ones, and make each time reference explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “decline,” “boosted,” “approaching,” and “approximately,” so the main trends are generally understandable. There are also some imprecise or unnatural choices: “most maximum number” is redundant, “stuck between zero to five million” is awkward, and “gained in number” is not a natural way to describe employment growth. Spelling errors such as “begining,” “Argiculture,” and “occuring” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise chart language and standard collocations, for example, “had the largest workforce,” “stood at around two million,” and “increased steadily.” This would make the comparisons clearer and more formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response includes a mix of simple and more complex forms, such as the contrast beginning “While the sector…” and the sentence comparing manufacturing with agriculture. Most meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors and punctuation issues are present. For example, “Manufacturing was the highest sector … with most maximum number” has an awkward, incomplete construction, while “Retail and Agriculture had more than five million jobs” needs clearer parallel phrasing. The sentence beginning “From fifteen million to approximately 12.5 million” is a fragment rather than a complete statement, and the comma after “though” is misplaced. Use complete sentences, check articles and agreement, and punctuate subordinate clauses carefully while retaining varied sentence structures.

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