Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph depicts the information regarding the sums of jobs in US, jobs has been divided into four categories.

Overall, the highest rate was seen from manufacturing company whereas, the least were shown from agriculture.

To commence with, it can be clearly stated that, in 1960, around 15 millions jobs was given in manufacturing and after that, it went slightly up in 1980 and stood around at 20 million. Moreover, in year 2000 and 2020 it was decreased at 13 million. Furthermore, in 1960, jobs in retail was showed 5 million. Then from 1980 to 2020 the figure rose dramatically at 15million.

Whereas, like retailing jobs in healthcare also showed a significant increased from 1960 to 2020 and stood at same point as retail. Lastly, agriculture sector provided around 3 million jobs in 1960. from 1980 to 2020 the figure remain steady.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and include some relevant figures, such as manufacturing rising to about 20 million in 1980 and healthcare increasing over the period. However, the overview is inaccurate: manufacturing was not the highest throughout, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million in 2020, while agriculture was lowest by the end. Several details are also missing or misreported: manufacturing fell to about 17 million in 2000 before reaching 13 million in 2020; retail rose from 6 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020; and agriculture declined from 6 million to 2 million rather than remaining steady. The response is 144 words, below the 150-word minimum. Add a precise overview and report the main changes accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about the sectors, and signposting such as “Moreover,” “Furthermore,” and “Lastly” helps show sequence. However, the progression is not consistently clear: manufacturing and retail are discussed together, while healthcare and agriculture are compressed into a short final paragraph. “Whereas” begins a sentence without a clear contrast, and the reference in “stood at same point as retail” is vague. Some linking phrases feel mechanical rather than showing precise relationships. Grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, with clear comparisons and a separate overview, would make the information easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “rose dramatically,” “significant increased,” and “figure,” and the reader can generally understand which sectors are being described. However, the range is limited and several choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “sums of jobs,” “highest rate,” “manufacturing company,” and “jobs was given.” Repetition of “figure” and “jobs” also limits precision. Use standard chart language such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” “sector,” “stood at,” and “declined.” Be careful to choose words that describe the data rather than imply a rate or a company. More accurate and varied vocabulary would make the comparisons clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use time references to describe change, but grammatical control is inconsistent. Errors include subject–verb agreement and number in “15 millions jobs was given,” the faulty construction “it went slightly up … and stood around at,” and “the figure remain steady.” Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “stood at same point” and the lowercase “from” after a full stop. These problems recur and sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to follow. Practise forming accurate past-tense comparisons, for example, “Manufacturing employment rose to 20 million in 1980, then fell to 13 million by 2020.” Shorter, well-controlled sentences would help before adding more complex structures.

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