Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of people employed in four different sectors of US economy namely manufacturing,healthcare,argiculture and retail between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the employment in the healthcare and retail rised over the period whereas agriculture experienced a significant decline. Manufacturing remained the largest employment until 2000 and gradually decline over the last period.By 2020,healthcare and retail sector had became the leading employment sectors.

In 1980,manufacturing was the highest employer,with approximately 20 million and after 1980 manufacturing employments experienced a significant decline. In 1980, retail employers was approximately 10 million and healthcare employer was only 5 millions, agriculture expericened a decline and less than 5 million employer.

Between 1980 and 2020,manufacturing employment declined from 20 million to around 13 million.On the other hand, retail continued grown over the year amd was peak in 2000,approximately 15 millions.

In conclusion, healthcare and retail experienced significant growth in employment, while manufacturing and agriculture witnessed a downward trend, with agriculture recording the lowest number of jobs by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing falls after its peak. The overview also notes that agriculture has the fewest jobs by 2020, which is supported by the chart. However, some key comparisons are incomplete or imprecise. You say manufacturing remained the largest sector until 2000, but it was overtaken by retail by 2000; by 2020, healthcare and retail are tied at about 16 million. The account also begins at 1980 and gives little information about the 1960 starting figures or healthcare’s strong rise from 2 million. Develop these comparisons and report the main turning points more accurately to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview, supporting paragraphs and a concluding sentence. The broad progression from overall trends to selected figures is understandable, and phrases such as “On the other hand” help signal contrast. However, the organisation is not consistently effective: the conclusion largely repeats the overview, while the body gives several 1980 figures and then moves to later years without a clear, balanced comparison across all four sectors. Some linking is mechanical, and the relationship between the overview’s claim about the leading sectors and the body’s details could be clearer. Grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, with a logical comparison of their endpoints, would improve progression and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “significant decline,” “leading employment sectors,” and “downward trend,” so the main ideas are generally clear. However, word choice and collocation are sometimes inaccurate or awkward, as in “retail employers,” “healthcare employer,” and “retail continued grown.” There are also spelling errors, including “argiculture,” “expericened,” and “amd,” which reduce precision. Repeated use of “employment” and “decline” also limits variety. Aim for accurate chart language such as “the number of jobs,” “employment in retail,” “rose steadily,” and “reached a peak.” Check spelling and use natural collocations when describing sectors and figures.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. For example, the overview contrasts sectors that rose with agriculture’s decline, while “On the other hand” introduces a contrasting trend. However, some errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction remain. Examples include “rised,” “gradually decline,” “had became,” and “retail continued grown”; these should use forms such as “rose,” “declined,” “had become,” and “continued to grow.” There are also missing spaces after commas and inconsistent punctuation, which make the text less controlled. Review past-tense forms and subject–verb agreement, and proofread sentence boundaries and punctuation while retaining a mix of sentence structures.

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