Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates that to give a clear understanding about the numbers of jobs in four sectors of economy in the us almost around 60 years.

Overall , it in this graps gives the scenerio about four job sectors .Along with that, here in health care sector there can be seen the job had surged up as well as there have huge differences noticble in manufacturing and agriculture sector to growing as well as about the decreasing.

Firstly, in between 1960 to 1980 there is a rosed up situation in manufacturing jobs which almost peaked at 20 millions.In between these around 20 year healthcare sector has also increasing number of jobs which is less that manufacturing though and its almost 5million. By contrast, after 1980 , in manufacturing the number of job has decreased in between 2000 to 2020 very slightly. It hit a low of less than 15 million. Besides, after 1980 in health sector the there is a surged line noticable which goes up to straight over 15million which is a staisfying jump though.

On the other hand, over 20 year from 1960 to 1980 agriculture has dropped from 5 million and the num,ber has decreased. Along with that, in case of retail sector the line rose up straight from 5 million to 10 million. Moreovwer, in agriculture after 1980 the line remained almost stable for next 20 year. But in retail after even 1980 the number of job increased from 10 to 15 millions and after 2000,the next 20 year it seems stable.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main subject and report several relevant trends, including manufacturing rising to a peak around 1980 before declining, healthcare growing, and agriculture falling. You also compare retail with other sectors. However, some figures and descriptions are inaccurate: agriculture starts at about 6 million, not 5 million, and retail rises to about 16 million by 2020 rather than remaining stable after 2000. The overview mentions differences but does not clearly summarise the key outcome that retail and healthcare finish as the largest sectors, while agriculture is the smallest. The manufacturing decline is also described as slight, although it falls from about 20 million to 13 million. More precise reporting and a clearer overview would make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group trends across the sectors. This gives the reader a generally coherent route through the information. Time markers such as “Firstly,” “after 1980,” and “On the other hand” help signal sequence and contrast. However, some links are mechanical or unclear, and several sentences combine ideas without a clear relationship, such as the overview’s “Along with that” sentence. The grouping also makes comparisons harder to follow when trends shift between sectors. Use clearer topic sentences and organise each paragraph around a meaningful comparison or set of related trends; ensure each linking phrase accurately expresses the relationship between the ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “peaked,” “decreased,” “remained almost stable,” and “surged,” which is appropriate for describing a graph. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, and some phrases make the meaning difficult to interpret: “a rosed up situation,” “the line rose up straight,” and “a satisfying jump.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “graps,” “scenerio,” “noticble,” and “Moreovwer.” Prefer precise, conventional expressions such as “increased steadily,” “reached a peak,” and “declined gradually,” and check spelling carefully. A more controlled range of vocabulary would help you describe the data clearly without relying on repeated or awkward phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and attempts at longer, more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “though” and “which.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but some sentence structures are faulty or incomplete. For example, “The graph illustrates that to give a clear understanding…” does not form a complete, natural clause, and “in health sector the there is a surged line” has problems with articles, word order, and verb construction. Tense and agreement are also inconsistent in phrases such as “healthcare sector has also increasing.” Punctuation and spacing around commas and full stops need attention. Build accuracy first with clear subject–verb sentences, then add subordinate clauses while checking that each clause has a complete and correctly formed verb.

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