Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrate the figure of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall , Manufacturing was on highest in 1980 , at 20 , Whereas , Heathcare sector was lowest in 1980 , at 4 . In 2020 , Healthcare and Retail is on same of accountablety , at 16 , However , Agriculture is decreased by 2 .

Manufacturing took an increase in 1980 at 20 and by the time passes it declined in 2020 at 14 . However , Healthcare sector was accounted lowest at 2 in 1960 , and Retail sector was at 6 ihn 1960 . Both sectors shows gradual rose in job at 16 in 2020 . Whereas , Agriculture waz

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several relevant features, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and the rise of healthcare and retail to about 16 million by 2020. However, the overview is unclear and includes an inaccurate comparison: healthcare was not the lowest sector in 1980, since agriculture was lower, at about 3 million. The final sentence is unfinished (“Whereas, Agriculture waz”), so the agriculture trend is not adequately reported, and some figures are imprecise. The response also contains 115 words, below the required 150, which limits how fully you can select and explain the main features. Complete the comparison of all four sectors and provide a clear overview of their contrasting trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response into an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph, and linking words such as “Overall,” “However” and “Whereas” show an effort to connect ideas. Nevertheless, progression is difficult to follow because comparisons shift abruptly between sectors, and some links do not express a clear relationship. For example, “Both sectors shows gradual rose” is unclear about which sectors are being compared, while the final “Whereas” introduces an unfinished point. The overview also combines several details without a clear organising contrast. Use one paragraph for the main trends and another for selected comparisons, and ensure each linking word introduces a complete, logically connected idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “declined,” “lowest” and “gradual,” and the reader can generally recognise the sectors and trends you intend to describe. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, making parts difficult to understand. “On highest” and “same of accountablety” do not express the intended comparisons naturally; “took an increase” is also an unsuitable phrase for a rising figure. Spelling errors such as “Heathcare,” “ihn” and “waz” further reduce clarity. Practise standard chart language such as “reached a peak,” “stood at the same level” and “increased steadily,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including comparisons introduced by “However” and “Whereas,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in “The line graph illustrate” and “Both sectors shows,” while “Healthcare and Retail is” also has a subject–verb agreement problem. Several sentence patterns are incomplete or difficult to parse, particularly “Healthcare sector was accounted lowest at 2” and the unfinished final clause. Punctuation and spacing around commas are also inconsistent. Build accurate basic sentences first—for example, “The graph illustrates…” and “Both sectors showed a gradual rise”—then combine them with a small number of well-controlled contrast clauses.

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